FAMILY LIFE :Marriage is the covenant relationship between a man and a woman to create a godly home. It is a divine institution and must be respected. Covenant is not a promise, so marriage is not a promise, but a covenant. Marriage is not a cultural issues, but divine issues. The Jerusalem of every Leader is his marriage (Acts 1:8). God was practically involved in the first marriage. He created it himself, he did not send any delegate, so without God, It is impossible to a good marriage. Leadership is harnessing your potentials to achieve specified goal and or harnessing the potentials of others in an organization to achieve organizational goal and one of the main requirement of ministry leadership is good married/family life (1Timothy 3:2-5). A leader with a bad marriage is not qualified to serve as an overseer or pastor. Marriage is a very essential part for success in Ministry.Acts 1:8. It has been proved historically and scripturally that successful ministry or ministries are product of successful family life reason being: 1. Charity begins at home as a minister; it is your example and not what you preach that you are communicating to other. God uses success in your home as a parameter for how well you are rated in the kingdom of God. 1Timothy 3: 4-5, 1peter 3:7. If you can’t rule your family well, God cannot allow you to rule the church. 2. A Minister has no secret life you are as a city set upon the hill. Matthew 5: 14-16. 3. The peace of mind of any minister must be intact before he can effectively yield to God. 4. To avoid dethronement, like Adam and Eve. They were driven away from the place of pleasure and enjoyment into toiling and sorrow. To avoid this, the minister’s family must be in place. Gen 3:23-24. 5. What you don’t have, you cannot impact (Acts 3:5). RESPONSIBILITIES OF THE MINISTER It is the responsibility of the man to provide for his household, when he fails here, he fails God it is also his responsibility to take care of his children (Prov.22:6). Responsibility To His Wife 1. He is to love his wife as Christ loves his church. 2. He is to see to her satisfaction before the Lord by the word of God. 3. He is to dwell with her according to knowledge. 4. He is to honour her as the weaker vessel 1 Peter 3:7. Responsibility To His Children 1. He is to train them in the way of the Lord (Prov.22v6). 2. He is to care for their needs per time. 3. He is to guide t6he child with the help of God into the plan and purpose of god for the child. 4. He is to ensure the growth and development of the child rooted in the word. Responsibility To His Parents 1. He should obey his parents where they are right. 2. He must honour his father and his mother. Your finding each other for marriage is not by chance, you are predestined to come together. The starting point of our family relationship is understanding that we are supernaturally led. When that understanding is in place, a strong love for one another must be maintained. Conscious Steps To Sustain The Fire Of Love: Song of Solomon 8:6-7 stated that “many waters cannot quench love”. To ensure this, the following steps are required: 1. We must be tolerant of our weaknesses 2. Show kindness to one another: by giving gifts, help. 3. Be humble: learn to say sorry, please and thank you. 4. To make sacrifice. Think of satisfying your spouse all the time. 5. Think good thought about your spouse Phil. 4:6. 6. Endure with joy, this help you withstand stress. 7. Believe well about your spouse, never be suspicious. 8. Be full of faith that your spouse will be better someday. 9. Learn to accommodate one another. 10. Learn not to compare your spouse with another person. 11. Ensure healthy and effective communication. COMMUNICATION One very important aspect of any covenant is communication. It is the mortar that holds the family together. If you talk together, you will stay together. Communication is the act of passing word, something or information across. To communicate means to transfer thoughts. The difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consist in leaving 3 or 4 things daily unsaid. No conversation would degenerate to argument. The more argument you win, the farther apart you stand. Component of Communication 1. Trust 2. Understanding 3. Wisdom Vehicle for Communication a. Words b. Actions Benefits of effective communication 1. Intimacy 2. Self awareness 3. Acceptance 4. Better understanding of yourself. Enhancing communication 1. Listening 2. Truthfulness 3. Correct timing One of these things causes 90% of the friction in marriage. a. Wrong timing b. wrong setting c. wrong manner of communication This is the when, where, and how of communicating. MATURITY FOR MARRIAGE Maturity is one of God’s standard for marriage. Gen. 2:24, Eph. 5:31. In God’s concept of Marriage, marriage is for men and women, not for boys and girls. There are 2 factors among others that determine maturity. a. Ability to make decision and accept responsibility for your decision. b. Age When the spouses are matured, it because easy for them to follow God’s concept of marriage. The success of a home is determined to a large extent on the level of maturity of the husband and wife.
Posted on: Mon, 01 Sep 2014 11:43:50 +0000