FOR KEN HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS): I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? Hes all right now. The roundest knight at King Arthurs table was Sir Cumference. When the butcher backed into the meat grinder he got a little behind in his Work. To write with a broken pencil is pointless. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. The thief, who also stole a calendar, got twelve months. A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened Criminal. Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking. Well never run out of math teachers because they continue to multiply. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A. The math professor really did a number on the blackboard. The professor discovered that his earthquake theory was on shaky Ground. Dead batteries were given out free of charge. Caution: If you take a laptop computer when you are out for a run, you could jog your memory. The dentist and the manicurist fought tooth and nail. A bicycle cant stand alone; it is two tired. A will is a dead giveaway. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. A backward poet writes inverse. In a democracy its your vote that counts; in feudalism, its your Count that votes. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. If you dont pay your exorcist you can get repossessed. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and Ill show you A-flat miner. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France,resulted in linoleum blown apart. You are stuck with your debt if you cant budge it. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under. He broke into song because he couldnt find the key. A calendars days are numbered. A lot of money is tainted: Taint yours, and taint mine. A boiled egg is hard to beat. He had a photographic memory which was never developed. A plateau is a high form of flattery. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. Once youve seen one shopping center youve seen a mall. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought shed dye. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. Santas helpers are subordinate clauses. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
Posted on: Wed, 23 Oct 2013 05:52:33 +0000
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