February 14th, 2014 a miscarriage took the 4th baby from us… the 4th baby that was an amazing 2013 Christmas surprise for our family. I received a huge amount of input, advice and prayers from family, friends, clients and more. Unfortunately, I was unaware there are many, many scarred women who have been through miscarriages with out real reasons why it occurred… or if they will reoccur. My doctor simply said that during the 15th week of my pregnancy my baby’s heart stopped forming and beating correctly… I had done nothing wrong. People told me: “this was God’s will or God’s way… having 4 children would have been too difficult for you.” I also heard, many times, “don’t you know how to prevent this?” To avoid shedding tears infront of people, I always just smiled and walked away, or became busy and hung up the phone. There are many questions this life has thrown at me about “God’s will”… cancer, fatal illnesses, Christian missionaries dying while out in the field serving and many more. I will ask my Maker and Savior when I get to meet Him in Heaven. I will not receive answers on this earth, but I will not loose my faith in God. I’m understaning that my simple human mind cannot grasp all of God’s mysterious and mighty ways. Now we have a new humbling situation that daily puts me on my knees thanking God for allowing me to have this baby healthy one more day… I’m nearly 5 months pregnant, almost 20 weeks along, and today we found out are having a girl. I’m growing very attached to this one as I feel movements, kicks and jumps. My faith is increased daily and I have to seek God’s Word, the Bible, when I am fearful, doubtful and scared of death. In addition to all this, we took the advice from a well known women’s doctor on pregnancy prevention in May and we are in a higher risk pregnancy condition now. I felt obligated to write this as we share the news with our extended family, friends, co-workers, clients and so many more. The due date for Deary baby #5 is February 14th, 2015. God gives and takes away, blessed be the name of the LORD.
Posted on: Wed, 24 Sep 2014 22:06:00 +0000
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