Finger breaking tradition by Miss Ole Tradition: a very interesting aspect of life. I dont have a set tradition because I am a Motswana. The thing is we must admit it, Batswana tradition has been so infused with Western tradition and Christianity that we cannot really tell what our traditions are. My family is the worst hit by a lack of tradition. Being an offspring of a Sangoma has not spared me the ignorance of Batswana. I judged my mother harshly because I was such a self righteous born-again Christian that I missed learning about tradition. By the time I was ready to learn about my tradition and culture she passed on. We, Batswana are simply not as traditional as other native groups. Whip me if you want...Grrrr... We are not traditional. I am convinced our kids speak better English and in tongues (the Biblical language) than Setswana. Anyway, the reason I took to writing this piece is inspired by two experiences why cultural diversity is important and how I had to take a bullet for darkies and endure grilling sessions on behalf of my black folks. Being black is not easy, being a black woman can be horrible I always have to mention to some of my white friends when I whine about realities we faced with sometimes. I have dared one friend to try be a black woman for a day. You see I have experienced being a suspect in a film set during my film school days when staff that belonged to one of the popular girls disappeared. Tirelo, are you sure you have not seen her bracelets...? All eyes on me. At the time I was not confident enough to ask Is it because I am black? I was the only black in the group. I presumed my pigmentation had to do with it. Took one for the group. These nyaope addicts dont make things easy for us. Their kleptomania tendencies gives some racist a feast of callings us all derogatory names and ever be suspicious of blacks. Serial mothers also make it hard for us to have fatherless kids. I went to Mohaus school event and all the black mothers had no partners. I have only seen Zimbabwean fathers at some school events. Yes, blacks dont look alike. There is a difference between a South African and a Zimbabwean. One being that most black men born during Verwoerd days dont take care of their kids. We can blame it on Apartheid I guess. Dont bark at me if you are a sensitive. We all know and have friends even family members that are irresponsible fathers. Growing up, having a responsible father was a luxury. At least my dad died. Notwitholding that in my moment of hearing voices as a teenager, it was revealed that he had other kids out of marriage. I confronted Mama and she confirmed four other fatherless kids by my father. Yes... I see staff and hear voices. Freaky isnt it? Although I must admit, most born frees are good fathers and my friends are really doing a good job at rectifying the mistakes of their absent fathers. I took a decision that my second born will have a father. Its not easy to be a pregnant black woman. Most of the time you are likely to be on your own. When you go shopping, some Chinaman or shop assistant will be following you wondering if you are pregnant or carrying stolen goods. That is why I encourage my gatvol friends who dont know how to break up with their boyfriends to tell them baby I have missed their periods. I think I am pregnant. The results of such utterances are clear. He is gone. Out of the door. Just hope that this boyfriend is not one of those rare gems who will stand by your side and tell his parents that o robile leoto (loosely translated: he broke your leg) Meaning he made a girl pregnant. You are stuffed. This will result in an huge embarrassment for you and your family. Tirelo, why do you break you childrens fingers? Imagine the shock on my face. Who? What? What are you talking about? I asked. Apparently one of my former colleagues had budged into the office and demanded days off. Its hard to get leave days in our line of work because its essential services. Ones absence can be devastating to the whole group. Easy example: There is no Sound Operator when we have to go on air. We cant go on air. I will call him Killer. Killer just walked in the office and demanded days off. He says he has to go to the Eastern Cape to break his sons finger I started laughing. I am those annoying characters that laughs at everything. I once laughed after being caught cheating on my ex-boyfriend. No.. no.. no... dont get excited. I was only kissing the other guy. Got you...pervert. I laugh at everything. Even when I am nervous or angry. I laugh. I have delayed reactions. No man. Not all of us practise that tradition. Its for a certain group of Xhosas in the Eastern Cape and I am a Motswana. When did you hear me say I am going to break my daughters finger? Ijakg!. I explained why Killer had to honour his ancestors. I dont remember my rantings but he got his leave days. Which reminded me of a Motswana friends aunt who was married to the finger breaking Xhosa group. She told me Ke ba tlogetse fela ba ya go robala MaXhosa. Ka tsosa banake ka three phakela. Ra palama terena re boela Vryburg. Aitse lenyalo la me le sentswe ke menwana ya bana ba. She said in a drunken stupor. She lost her marriage due to this finger breaking tradition. She left her husband and in-laws in the early hours when the ritual was to be observed. Not all darkies break their childrens fingers. I just wonder why darkies are the only ones that sees tokoloshes, can send each other lightning (apparently you can buy it at Marabastad for fifty rands in a paperbag) and never see UFOs. (This is not part of the book. Just a random thought) Remember to spread the love.
Posted on: Tue, 13 Jan 2015 10:56:46 +0000
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