For those of you who missed David Camerons victory speech this morning in front of 10 Downing Street, here is a transcript, conveniently translated into Churchills simple English: Im the silly git and stupid tosser who just dodged a bullet because I was too thickheaded to believe the Scots actually would sober up long enough to vote secession. And for those of you who never recognized that it was my partys irresponsible social policies that brought about this crisis in the first place, I want to reassure you all that I havent changed one whit and will demonstrate it by promptly declaring my willingness to crawl into bed with the fascists calling themselves West Lothians and UKIPs or whatever other manufactured group of reactionary malcontents Rupert Murdoch can whip up for my political convenience. After all, if I were a decent and honourable politician, I would be tendering my resignation to Her Majesty this morning. But since Id rather be PM than a decent human being, I am declaring war on the Scots and the Labour Party by scaring the everliving hell out of just about everyone. Youll be sorry you stuck around. Im going to make what we did to William Wallace look like Dancing With The Stars. Hell, Im only sorry Oswald Moseley isnt alive to join my next government as Chancellor of the Exchequer. That would teach you rowdy Scotsmen to complain about Whitehall. _______________________________________________________________ Camerons speech, needless to say, did not impress me. To paraphrase the words of another Tory PM, Cameron so bore himself so that if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, This was his worst hour. What has brought us to the point where conservative politicians across the whole Western world have confused arrogance for conciliation and coercion for comity? I hope Miliband mops up the floor with Cameron after next years elections. It would be justice for Cameron to be thrashed by a child. But, alas, I sound bitter...
Posted on: Fri, 19 Sep 2014 07:45:12 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015