For your reading pleasure... Short Puns A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt, and is named Ahmal. The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him Juan. Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, Theyre twins! If youve seen Juan, youve seen Ahmal. Steven Spielberg was discussing his new project - an action docudrama about famous composers starring top movie stars. Sylvester Stallone, Steven Segall, Bruce Willis, and Arnold Schwarzenegger were all present. Spielberg strongly desired the box office oomph of these superstars, so he was prepared to allow them to select whatever composers they wished to portray, as long as they were famous. Well, started Stallone, Ive always admired Mozart. I would love to play him. Chopin has always been my favorite, and my image would improve if people saw me playing the piano, replied Willis. Ill play him. Ive always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes, said Segall. Id like to play him. Spielberg was very pleased with these choices. Sounds splendid. Then, turning to Schwarzenegger, he asked, Who do you want to be, Arnold? Arnold in a slow deliberate voice replied, Ill be Bach. Back in the 1800s the Tates Watch Company of Massachusetts wanted to produce other products and, since they already made the cases for pocket watches, decided to market compasses for the pioneers traveling west. It turned out that although their watches were of finest quality, their compasses were so bad that people often ended up in Canada or Mexico rather than California. This, of course, is the origin of the expression; He who has a Tates is lost!
Posted on: Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:18:41 +0000
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