From Catalyst Blake... Unlimited-Life Skills 101: Creating Joy Yes. Joy is a skill. Thats it. Thats really the whole secret. Once you start thinking of happiness as a skill, you regain control of your enjoyment of life. Even when things are rough, you recognize that you - someone who is talented at creating joy - can find happiness. You have the power. You arent a victim of circumstance anymore. How can you become talented at creating joy? It starts with life non-negotiables. What are your non-negotiables for your life? What do you honestly need to be happy in your day-to-day? If you dont know, start thinking about that. Take note of what makes your heart glow. If you do know what you need to be happy, what are you doing to work toward that? If youre not sure how to move toward happiness, here are the steps. 1. Start with your wildest dreams and work backward. Example: My sister is an incredible artist. She is happiest when shes painting. She told me that to be happy, she -needs- to be working on an art piece every day. She would love to stay home, drink tea, and paint - literally all of the time. Thats the Wildest Dream. Working backwards from the wildest dream: rent and food cost money, and to be happy and feel safe, she also -needs- a reliable income. So, because shes talented at creating joy, she found a part-time job with a regular schedule where sometimes she can even paint at work when it isnt busy. She works the minimum number of hours necessary to meet her basic needs. The rest of the time, she paints. All day. And shes happy. Every day. She took the wildest dream and worked backward. 2. Realize that the people you choose for your life will impact your ability to become skilled at happiness. Example: My partner is really, really good at creating joy. I call her a candy store because shes a million colours of laughter and freedom and love. She realized that in order to live a joyful life, she was only interested in being in a relationship if it was with somebody who was also good at creating happiness. She had a short list of non-negotiables for a partnership revolving around that one thing. She didnt want to be held back in her happiness-adventures. I had the same thing on my non-negotiable list, so finding each other was an epic win for both of us. If youre starting a new relationship and want to be talented at creating joy, look for a person who shows by their actions that they are building skills in this area. Do they choose to work toward happiness? Do they take responsibility for their joy? This applies to your Tribe of friends as well. Is happiness among their values? 3. Recognize that pursuing a wildest dream is unconventional. Its rare, and youre doing a courageous (and sometimes scary) thing. Beware of being held back by fear as you practice becoming talented at joy. Example: When I was a teenager, I dreamed of attending college and studying psychology. However, education wasnt encouraged in my family. In fact, I was the first person in my family besides my sister to finish high school. Graduating was a huge accomplishment on an emotional and practical level because I didnt feel a lot of support. After graduation, I went off into the work force for a decade; actually attending college never even occurred to me until I was 27 years old. My two best friends got the idea into my head, helped me put together my application, and one of them even walked to the mailbox with me to send it off. I was terrified. I could have cried right there in front of the mailbox. Pursuing happiness is risky. Its scary because putting your heart into what you really want is vulnerable. What if it doesnt work out? But what if it DOES? I realized that the risk was worth it. I was taking a shot at my own happiness. I got into my dream college, by the way, and for the record, applying was the single best decision I ever made. Its provided me with a series of opportunities to practice creating joy - a straight-up domino effect of magic. Update: Its several years later and Im working toward a Masters in Psychology. I didnt fail. Please, dont be afraid of happiness. Get talented at creating it. If you need support, I offer free 1/2 hour first sessions. Heres to living unlimited. Love, Catalyst Blake.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Dec 2014 16:48:56 +0000
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