From a beautiful mum Raising a Teen... Hi, I have a 13 year old son, who sometimes seems is going on 40. We have been through a lot as a family, mostly challenging with some of the good moments.. and so hes learned much for his age. He hasnt had his family around much, though I know we all are doing the best we know how. His dad works all the time though spends time with him when hes able, Ive been getting through health and personal issues even with him in the same room, and the rest of the family hasnt been around very often. My son has had to grow up on his own for a lot of it, despite us all being there the way we can. I think for the situation he has done well, and even learned things like responsibility, indepedence and compassion in some ways. My son and I have also had challenges in relating and communicating. I have had social and connecting issues being diagnosed with Aspergers and anxiety, which obviously has made it challenging in raising a child. I also didnt have a father around, and wasnt very close with my mother, so relationships have been an issue for me. There have been those glorious moments where well have the best talk or day ever, and like a miracle everything just finally works.. it feels like were a family.. and then Ill ask him questions about how hes doing, school or something normal and the wall comes up, or we stop relating for whatever reason. He dosent want to talk about how he is, which makes it hard as a mother since we dont live in the same house. Once the wall is up, its like having to start all over again. Im exhausted and tired of worrying but want him to know he has family that is there for him. Ill text or call him throughout the week, yet rarely get a response, though sometimes he will call me and I can tell hes making an effort. I wish we could get past the weeks and sometimes months of barely talking and being so distant. I do my best to think and be grateful for things that are going good. I want to see him do well in life, and feel like sometimes I overcompensate like my mother did when I was child because you dont know what else to do. Rather than wanting to talk, it becomes a clingy needy thing. He hates that, and will not talk to me out of pity or insecurities. Anyway, if anyone can understand or share an experience that would be great. I have not spoken with parents much or been in groups often. That is something that would be great to finally start doing. Thanks for reading!
Posted on: Tue, 13 Jan 2015 06:21:52 +0000