Good morning everyone ...... Its been a while since I have done a long status update but I thought today its about time. As you might not have known I have been going through a rough patch in my life over the last few months. At times I would seriously think that I might have to throw in the towel with my music. That I may be an outdated person in the scene just because I dont have any music awards to show for my years of commitment. I have lost things along the way as well like friends, peoples trust, possessions and sometimes my mind. My constant battle with my WEIGHT has been my lifetime issue and sometimes it feels like I cant win. I sweat HARD OUT when Im with people who I enjoy being around with. But when it comes to losing weight in front of strangers, I cower and I hate it. Especially when I see a person laughing at me in a negative view. Either I stop doing what I am doing or I feel like going to jail after smashing my fist through that persons mouth and ripping out their oesophagus. So I usually go with the first option. Thats usually my life story. Motivation has been a issue with me too. I only find adrenaline in myself when I find instant results. Like busking, sharing my theories with other good minded people (who I wish was everyone), dancing, enjoying the arts, just sharing altogether with good people (just like sharing this status). But when it comes to putting in that extra little effort, my previous experiences from being screwed over just for being too nice starts kicking in and I have doubts. It also doesnt help when I see and hear about people who take short-cuts are being GREATLY REWARDED for doing things wrong (like former female models getting paid THOUSANDS of DOLLARS just with pretend to be a DJ) My right knee has been playing up BAD. So that has added to some roughness to all of this too. Hello weight gain. But my pride has gotten the best of me. REALLY!!! It has. Here is some of the bad things have been hiding away from all of you. - My recent KING HOME BOY WINTER TOUR was a disaster. Period. - I STILL havent recorded ONE song properly as an INDIVIDUAL after all these years (AHHHHH!!!!!). - I am too afraid to make songs with samples in them because of copyright laws yet thats where most of my strong music material is at in this moment of my life. - I have NEVER had one successful funding application ever since I applied for my first one 5 years ago. - I still owe one person over $2,000 for his big contribution towards my trip to the WORLD BEATBOX CHAMPS in Germany 2011. - I havent honoured all of my rewards from my pledge me account for the WORLD BEATBOX CHAMPS Germany 2011. Which is why I am reluctant to start another pledge me page. - I probably might be on the streets busking this New years summers period as since NO festivals have not gotten back to me or they cant pay me to perform. Does $500 for new years eve sound too much to you? Especially when I can make more than that just busking on the streets on the same night? - I have to put my world record attempt on hold AGAIN!!!! so that I can organise it properly. - I am too afraid to admit that I do perform for the money as well as loving my art form. But then who doesnt like getting paid for something that they love doing. Am I a sell-out because of that even though its called music BUSINESS? - I have been blamed and been told that I am solely responsible for the NZ BEATBOXING SCENE being dormant all because I have been in the spotlight too long (That F#*KED me RIGHT OFF when I heard that) these plus many more other problems that I am too PRIDEFUL to reach out and help because of my fear of looking weak in the eyes of the public. And yet I feel like a hypocrite when I am posting up about being positive and staying strong when clearly you see that I am in a mess myself. But here is when the good part starts coming in. I have been SLOWLY but surely been FIXING MYSELF. I have started to get back in the groove of things and get that spark that I had at the beginning of the year with OLMECHA SUPREME after our summer tour with FAT FREDDYS DROP. I have been working on my strengths like my dancing and music. As a result I have now acquired what I now call my second form of my RAPBOXING (beat rhyming for those in the U.S.A) and I am expanding on it. I also danced my butt off while listening to AKOUO for a few hours at cassette nine last wednesday night :) ..... Having a good jam on Logic Pro X yesterday (didnt record anything though :( ) Things I hope is looking good on the rise. And now since most of this is out in the open (like I usually like it), I feel a little bit lighter on the heart. But to be honest with everyone, it is going to take time. But I and trying to change and reinvent myself so that I can reach my dream of becoming the TRUE KING that I have always wanted to be. If you have read all of this, then I thank you so much for your time and support that you have given me. I hope my future statuses will become more positive and inspiring from now on. I hope you have a good day and once again .... thank you for reading LIVE LIFE, LIVE LONG, LIVE WELL KING.
Posted on: Mon, 15 Sep 2014 18:50:22 +0000
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