Good words from Patti Lind: Communication Tip of the Month: We deserve the reputation weve earned. Take a moment to think about your reputation? What do you think is most commonly said about you behind your back? Are you known for your timely responsiveness? Or notorious for being late or perhaps not responding at all. Do people appreciate you for always following through with your commitments? Or are you seen as a yes person who rarely delivers? Perhaps you are admired for your openness and resiliency in tough conversations? Or viewed as being someone who is too reactive and defensive to approach safely. In my work, it is quite common to come across people who are technically proficient at what they do, but so self-oriented that they are quite difficult to work with. Their earned reputation is Im right and Im not going to do anything that doesnt suit me. If things dont go to my liking, I will make it difficult for everyone. Perhaps the most damaging of all self-earned reputations is the unwillingness to take personal responsibility. These individuals are skillful at denial, self-justification and blame … but it doesnt take long for co-workers to recognize that their colleague is someone who points the finger at others instead of taking their fair share of the responsibility. Besides being a real trust buster, being unwilling to take personal responsibility has the added factor of blinding us from all the other ways we are undermining our own reputation. Showing a lack of regard for other peoples time, not being true to your word, being unusually reactive to feedback and not taking personal responsibility are all ways that talented people can earn reputations which cast them in a negative light. The good news is that people change their reputations every day and it isnt that hard to do. Here are the steps for strengthening your reputation. Step One: Stop saying the same old refrains. I was late because of traffic. I couldnt get back to you because I got too busy. I lost my temper because you … I get angry because I have higher standards than every around here. It wasnt me. Step Two: Start incorporating the language of personal ownership. I am sorry. I was at fault. I see my part in what happened. I can see what I need to do differently. Step Three: Actively start making amends. Arrive on time to meetings. Reply to emails within 24 hours. Make a commitment, and keep it. Learn how to self-manage your reactions. Even if some people have decided that you will never change, my experience is that most people are open to thinking more favorably of people they are around everyday. After all, they have wanted to feel more comfortable working or living with you for a long time. Once they see that your efforts are more than a flavor of the month and are actually a growth in maturity, they will probably be quite appreciative and responsive.
Posted on: Tue, 15 Oct 2013 17:42:58 +0000
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