Gosh hasnt it been a fast year? I have just gotten used to writing 2014 and now its time to change to 2015! I guess I will start dating things correctly in about June or so. Time is moving so fast! Its been a good year. Jake is a senior in college. He has far surpassed my expectations for him as a college student. He is a civil engineer major...an extremely difficult course of study. He has remained focused and studied and gotten good grades - excellent grades - and now he has only 2 semesters left before he graduates next December. He already has a job offer on the table at a mind-blowing starting salary! He has only one more year and then he is off and running. My baby boy isnt a baby anymore...but he will ALWAYS be MY baby. I am more proud of him than I could ever express and I love him beyond words. I thank God for him every...single...day. I could so easily have lost him that day when I lost Kim. I honestly do not know that I would still be here if that had happened. He is my heart, my pride and my future. I have another very special guy in my life, as most of you know. Randy Wooden was truly a gift from above. I needed someone in my life who could love me through the good times and the tough times. Someone who could handle the baggage that comes with grief...someone who would understand that this is baggage that I will never be able to just lay down and walk away from. Someone who would provide me with a shoulder to cry on and not think he has to fix things. Thank you Randy Wooden for coming in to my life and making me realize that its okay to laugh and to smile. We have had a great year together. We spent a lot of time doing things that we both enjoy...and there are lots of them! We are so similar in our likes and dislikes that it is uncanny! We took up golf, which we both enjoy, though we arent very good at it...yet. I have a strong feeling that Randy will get good at it long before I do...but thats okay. The best part of playing golf is that it is something that we enjoy doing together. For those of you wondering about the Scrabble trophy...it is still in my possession and likely to remain that way for awhile! How am I doing personally? I have good days and I have bad days. I guess I always will. I am not the same person I was before I lost my child. I am harder...I am less naïve...I am more outspoken...and I am stronger. There was a day when my children were small that I clearly remember thinking that if I were to lose one of my children it would surely kill me. Well I did....and it didnt. There have been days when I wished I were dead...and days when I was glad that I wasnt. Life is not fair but we are not the authors of life...that is Gods job. I may not always agree with the path that He leads me down but if I am to survive this life then I have to trust Him...and keep going....and believe that he knows best. Thanks to all of my family and friends who have stuck by me and supported me. I wish you all a wonderful and prosperous 2015!
Posted on: Mon, 29 Dec 2014 15:54:20 +0000
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