Grief and loss like this changes a person. Suddenly your idealized view of the world is shattered and theres no going back. You cant make it better. It seems like people either find faith and lean heavily on it or they lose faith in everything. I admit I was one who lost faith in everything for a while. I did what I had to do to get through the days without you. I went to work, I went to the meetings, I went to the holidays, I went to the dinners and the parties. I went where I was supposed to go when I was supposed to go there and eventually a wonderful thing happened. I found some sort of empowerment from doing those things. Yes, I went through this horrible life changing thing that I wouldnt wish on anyone, but I was still showing up. I made it through the all consuming grief and anger and eventually I found faith again. Not in a higher being or even other people but in myself. Losing you was horrifyingly awful but it made me a stronger person and now I can see that I was so lucky to have had you in my life. Some people go through their entire life without experiencing the kind of love and life I had with you. People shouldnt feel sorry for me because I lost you, they should be happy for me because I had you and now all those memories are mine forever. Miss and love you Mr. J - More than words. ~Mrs. J
Posted on: Wed, 05 Nov 2014 19:22:44 +0000
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