Hahahahaha crazy creative kenyans.......K.C.S.E LEAKEGES 2013 Kiswahili paper 1: Kwenye picha ya Ole Kiyapi uliyopewa, jaza pengo.” (alama kumi) Maths. Which one is the most difficult to understand? (5 mks) a. Men b. Women c. Mathematics Kiswa – Andika wingi wa Kibaki… a)Mabaki b)Mmmmwa-Kibaki c)Mkibaki d)Wakibaki GHC – AP stands for: A)Atakumurder Pap B)Abnormal Police B) Askari Pumbavu C)Administratin Psychopath D) Akikuja potea E)Afadhali Punda Home Science: Which of the following foods is NOT rich in protein a)Chips Masala b) Chips Funga c)Chips Beba Maths – Draw with a protractor & pencil how Ruto “jumped into conclusion” & went to the hague Kiswa - Maliza Methali *Akili Ni Nywele* *Ujinga ni Weave* *Wazimu ni Mohawk History: Discuss: Charging a Vitz KES 300 for parking fees is a form of child abuse (15 Marks) Chemistry: Discuss the chemistry in this reaction… (mwanaume ni effort). (4 marks) Chemistry: Calculate the concentration of sugar in “utamu wa yesu”. (6 marks) CRE: Considering his love for silverware, explain why judas couldn’t have been an Arsenal supporter. (20 marks) Chemistry: When you send a girl a long text and she replies with ‘K’, which chemical element does that symbol belong to? (2 Marks) English Paper I: Your Vitz has stalled. What could be the reason A) You’re stuck on a chewing gum. (6 marks) History: Name at least 2 tourist camps you know in Kenya: Answer a) Camp Mulla b) Badman Camp (5 marks) Geog. pp2 – Classify the rocks used by Gor fans. 1.Volcanic 2.Sedimentary. C.R.E pp1 – When moses received the two tablets on mt. Sinai were they from Apple or i-Mac? (10mrks) BIO P1 – Explain why modern technology does not recognize apple n blackberry as fruits anymore (4mks). Maths paper 2:Calculate the speed of a poor guy to an mpesa shop if he has received money from a wrong number, given that he has not paid his rent(20mks) Art & Craft; Name Three Joints. Answer: Rafikiz, Changes and Tamasha C.R.E: How do we know Eve was not Chinese? Ans. She ate the fruit not the Snake GHC: Where is the Largest migration in Kenya ? A) Maasai Mara B) Thika rd C) Ngong rd D) Jogoo rd Kiswahili: Andika sentensi hii kwa wingi: Mwalimu aliniita. – Ans: Waalimu walitwitter. Kiswahili: Kamilisha methali: Mtaka cha mvunguni….sharti a-bendover. Kiswahili: Kamilisha methali ifuatayo …. “Usipoziba woofer , utachoma pia amplifier ” GHC: Mwalenga…………… Who was the 1st Luo in the bible? – Nick Odemus. Kiswahili: Ninajivunia kuwa Mke… A) be B) ka C) nya D) nge GHC: What does G4S stand for? a) Gone 4 Sure b) Goons 4 Stealing c) Gone in 4 Seconds d) All the above GHC: Select a national school you would like to go to after passing your exams. A.Starehe boys B.Alliance high C.Mang’u high D.Tahidi High History: Name one place in Kenya where you will find coffee and sugarcane growing. – Kahawa Sukari. English: Use defence, defeat and detail to make a sentense. Answer: De cow jumped de-fence, de-feat landed before de-tail. Kiswahili: Tunga Sentensi Ukitumia “Jumatatu”. – Nilitembea kwenda tao Ju Matatu Za kwetu Ziligoma! English: What do you call a KPLC van behind a G4S van? – Mulika Mwizi! English: What is the opposite of Wetangula – Dryangula. English: What do you call a window cleaner in Nyanza? -Transparent wall technician Kiswahili: Translate in Kiswahili: Private School = Shule nyeti. Physics Paper 2: Wanjala is boiling water. Calculate the probability of him cooking Ugali,making tea or Taking a shower… Kisw pp3(102/3) SWALI LA LAZIMA! RIWAYA YA NGELI YA GENGE Dondoo! “….kigeugeu…..eeeeh kigeugeu…..nikijaribu juu chini nivukeboda….waninigeukia….” Maswali: Eleza muktadha wa dondoo. Taja na ueleze wanaorejelewa kama vigeugeu. Taja na ueleze mbinu ya lugha inayojitokeza wazi katika dondoo! Je mwandishi alivuka boda? Dhibitisha!
Posted on: Wed, 23 Oct 2013 10:42:46 +0000