Halloo, world. This is Weej Chaives bringing to you your 2 a.m. - TopicsExpress

Halloo, world. This is Weej Chaives bringing to you your 2 a.m. news, hope yall are enjoying your sleep. Dream forecasts predict mild chances of nightmares but nothing to seriously disrupt your REM stages, ladies and gents. In other news, Facebook declares they are buying the Philippines. Negotiations between the government and Mr. Zuckerberg are currently ongoing. Like, seriously, if we were able to buy Canada... CANADA... then why not, right? WE RICH, *expletive*! was Zuckerbergs response during todays press conference. In sports, the Miami Heat win the 2014 Fifa World Cup after a thrilling match against Roger Federer, scoring the last touchdown and even adding a homerun during the last few seconds of the fourth round to secure the win by submission. This has been your 2 a.m. news, Im Weej Chaives signing off. Good mornight. *teneneneeedeetdeeededeteneee*

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