Happiness is directly commensurate with Gratefulness I’ve been back for a month. I’m still unable to sleep through the night, and managing days of deep sadness, missing the kids. During these days I’ve wondered whether I’ve paid a karmic debt. I’ve questioned the possibility that I could have been someone in the Khmer Rouge who caused great suffering. I’ve questioned whether that great suffering is the debt I’ve just paid, and the reason why all of a sudden I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders. The elation of being home is not as euphoric as it was in the first couple of weeks, though my deep gratitude for who I am and where I live continues to surprise me. The wall of gratefulness I experienced in the final concert the kids gave at CCT flushed every cell of my body, every genealogical memory, every negative emotion from who I am. For the concert finale, every child was on stage, with their teachers who had helped me with translations, to sing, stomp and clap while I played djembe. I sat centre front of the jubilation, engulfed by the gorgeous, excited, grateful vibrations of over 100 human beings. My 1 true goal was to create a platform for these kids to succeed, and to share their success with their community. I trained and placed their teachers to share their success within the performance pieces as anchors. I built physical expectations in as the weeks of classes went by, so as the kids would have comfortable associations with performing on the stage, facing lights and a crowd. I drip-fed skills through games and tasks, followed their cues, learned what they loved and needed, then created performance pieces from what they were already doing. The kids were already amazing, with emotional anchors all around, and associations built in to support them, the applause of an adoring audience crowned the process with it’s end goal. Their entire community succeeded! The floods of love and gratefulness that overwhelmed me on that stage that night has been the most profound healing. I’m the happiest I can every remember being. I discovered through experience that Happiness is directly commensurate with Gratefulness. Cyndi Tan The Cambodian Children’s Trust is still looking for sponsors for these amazing children. To find out more go to: cambodianchildrenstrust.org/how-to-help/
Posted on: Sun, 28 Sep 2014 03:14:28 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015