Have you or someone you know lost a child? While Mother’s Day may be a painful trigger for bereaved moms, it is also an opportunity to celebrate these women and their children. Here are some ideas to honor them this Mother’s Day: 1. Affirm her identity as a mother A woman’s love for her deceased child never dies, nor does her motherhood. Celebrate the mom who carried her baby, no matter how briefly, and is strong enough to wake up each day and keep going after the death of that child. Let her know you are thinking of her. 2. Celebrate her child Talk about the baby that died and use the child’s name. Look at pictures and discuss the experience. Bereaved mothers will generally commemorate the anniversaries of the baby’s birth and death, but Mother’s Day provides another cherished opportunity for remembrance. 3. Spend quality time together On a day that is likely to be lonely for the bereaved mom, instead of a card in the mail, give the gift of time. Your attention and friendship will create a lasting impact. 4. Give thoughtful gifts There are many companies that make bereavement jewelry, statues and ornaments. Other ideas include books, picture frames, candles or personalized keepsakes. Or you could make a donation to a hospital, bereavement program or charity in the child’s or mother’s name. Even a thoughtful letter may be the perfect way to show you care. 5. Ask how she is doing and listen Ask the mother how she is coping and welcome her vulnerability. The best approach is to let her do the talking. Know that you do not need to solve the event or fix the emotions; these things need to be experienced and expressed and this is often helpful in itself. Create a safe environment for the bereaved mother to share. You can do this by open body language, eye contact and active listening. If the mother is struggling, encourage her to take good care of herself and find support. A woman never stops being her child’s mom, whether her baby is with her or not. Bereaved mothers have survived excruciating pain and yet carry on. This bravery deserves recognition—especially on Mother’s Day. Alexis Marie Chute’s, Mom to Angel Baby Zachary
Posted on: Wed, 07 May 2014 19:53:13 +0000
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