Hello Facebook Friends. This is Schelli’s mom, Carrie, I hacked my daughter’s Facebook so I could get this message out to all of you. I think she’ll change her password after this. The past couple years have been extremely tough on my family. We have struggled with major losses in our life. As a mom, one of the toughest things is to feel that you can’t “fix” certain circumstances that are occurring in your child’s life; sometimes it is just “out of your control.” This is hard and frustrating and I have struggled with letting go, letting God handle it. So I try and fix things and feel failed when it doesn’t work out. There was a point when my life felt like it was spiraling out of control. I lost my aunt who was like a sister to me, to MRSA and I tried but couldn’t fix her, she died a terrible death at the age of 56. All of you know the story of John, Schelli and Kherington. Their story has inspired so many, made many laugh, cry and take inventory in their lives of what is truly important and be thankful for the things in their life that matter the most. I could never be more proud of my daughter and the person God has created her to be. Although I couldn’t fix the situation and take away the pain, I could be there to hold her up when her legs were too weak to carry on. Unfortunately, as a mother I felt that that alone was not enough and felt darkened because the situation was beyond my control. When John miraculously survived liver failure after the first round of chemo, and they were sent by Mercy Flight to Seattle in hopes of gaining control over the leukemia, I felt blessed, ecstatic and relieved. That evening I received a call that my mom (age 65) collapsed and was taken to the ER. I was back at the hospital and sat vigil for the next 4 days praying for recovery which was not to be the outcome. I chose to keep the situation from Schelli as she sounded so happy when she would call with updates on John. We removed my mother from life support 4 days later. The day following John and Schelli’s return home from Seattle, I buried my mom. The only thing that felt stable in my life was my job, a place I loved and had invested 11 years of my life to. When we found out that John’s leukemia was out of remission and things weren’t looking good, I was notified by my employer that due to “the revenue decline” they were forced to do a “reduction in force”. I hadn’t been without a “job” for 25 years, now what? Just when I felt like life was turning around, my youngest daughter Heather called and let me know that she had to travel out to Seattle to pick up 3 beautiful children because their mom found out she has cancer, the diagnosis is challenging and the prognosis is terrifying. I felt defeated, questioned over and over, why?? I have tried to handle things on my own as I think most people do. I would reassure God that “I’ve got this” only crying out when it became too much to carry. We become so narrow focused it’s hard to see that God is there beside us, carrying us always, and taking care of all things. I felt the need to share this with you all because I am confident that there are some of you that are feeling defeated, alone, and not “in control” of “out of control” situations. I am sure that those of you who are “trying to do it on your own,” may think God is handling bigger problems or you may feel that if you reach out and ask for help, then somehow you have failed. Believe me when I say I understand. I also understand what a difficult and tough road it is to attempt alone. I am here to tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel and people that care. I have been so overwhelmed by the support we’ve received for my daughter Heather’s family. It has been humbling to receive the help of so many. It’s a gift I can’t explain or fully express my gratitude for. Each and every person that has read the stories, prayed for my family, dug through closets, inventoried what they could donate, provided school supplies, hair ties, bunk beds, gift cards, Christmas gifts, clothing and the list goes on, is proof that when you ask God to take over, you will be amazed. I am still a work in progress and knowing that God will never give me more than I can handle when I ask for his help provides me comfort. This mom can’t express the love I have in my heart for each one of you and how thankful I am to a God who has kept knocking on my door until I finally put pride aside and opened it. To my amazement, the light I was unable to see has now filled my life and I am excited for today and what God has in store for my family. Just know you aren’t alone, you’ll never be alone. I wish you all an amazing and safe Christmas season and I will pray that God blesses each one of you because you have blessed my family and helped this mom to find hope. -Carrie
Posted on: Thu, 11 Dec 2014 02:57:17 +0000