Hello. Today I am grateful for: 1) The courage to make a difficult choice. Instead of doing what I always do, and getting pulled in to the same self destructive place of a loved one, I had the courage to let go recognizing how I have contributed to enabling them by allowing the heart felt excuses and pleas, and the familiar but this is different. As usual, I felt this heaviness for being right back here again. I felt the same weighty disappointment, and on a beautiful day I gave away my joy and hid behind closed eyelids. I felt bad for stepping away when they had been doing better for a little while, but this morning I felt renewed because I realized I am breaking a habit, the habit of the enabler. Its hard to let go, but I finally have begun to do just that. I am grateful for recognizing that I cannot just pray they will change, I too must change, and that the feelings that go along with that difficult choice arent bad feelings. Its the feelings of change, the beginnings of a new growth spurt. 2) Sadly a dead dog was left on the sidewalk. I walked upon it as I was walking my dog last night. However, what was sad brought a group of strangers together, from all kinds of backgrounds, to help this poor creature. A community came together to make sure he/she did not remain discarded on the street. 45 minutes later we gave fist pounds, shook hands, introduced ourselves, and gave our blessings and best wishes to each other. It was nice to see how much all of these different people cared about this poor creature. 3) For the effort it takes me to find something to be grateful for each day. I literally go out each day looking for moments and inspiration. And because I so actively do so, I see so much more. I see what has been around me all the time. Its as though for that day the spot light illuminated some other corner of my life, some place I had over looked, walked pass, dismissed as insignificant, or ignored.
Posted on: Sun, 09 Mar 2014 13:50:51 +0000
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