Here are the 13 things mentally strong people dont do: 1. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves Many of lifes problems and sorrows are inevitable, but feeling sorry for yourself is a choice. Whether youre struggling to pay your bills or youre dealing with unexplained health problems, indulging in self-pity wont fix your problems. If youre prone to feeling sorry for yourself when the going gets rough, train your brain to exchange self-pity for gratitude. Mentally strong people dont waste their time and energy thinking about the problem, instead they focus on creating a solution. 2. Give Away Their Power It can be very tempting to blame other people for our problems and circumstances. Thinking things like, My mother-in-law upsets me, or My boss makes me feel bad about myself, gives others power over us. Take back your power by accepting full responsibility for how you think, feel, and behave. Empowering yourself is an essential component to building mental strength and creating the kind of life you want. 3. Shy Away From Change Although we feel safest when we stay within our comfort zones, avoiding new challenges serves as the biggest obstacle to living a full and rich life. Learning to recognize when you avoid change because of the discomfort involved in doing something new could be the first step in a long journey toward improving your life. The more you practice tolerating the discomfort associated with change -- whether it involves taking on a new job or leaving an unhealthy relationship -- the more confident youll become in your ability to control your future. 4. Waste Energy on Things They Cant Control So often, we worry about all the wrong things. Rather than focus on preparing for the storm, we waste energy wishing the storm wouldnt come. If we invested that same energy into the things we do have control over, wed be much better prepared for whatever life throws our way. Pay attention to the times when youre tempted to worry about something you cant control -- like the choices other people make or how your competitor behaves -- and devote that energy into something more productive. 5. Worry About Pleasing Others A lot of people say, I dont care what other people think, but often thats a defense mechanism meant to shield them from the hurt and pain associated with rejection. People-pleasers come in all forms. Sometimes you can spot one a mile away and at other times, their fear of angering others is deeply rooted. Doing and saying things that may not be met with favor takes courage, but living a truly authentic life requires you to live according to your values, even when your choices arent popular. 6. Fear Taking Calculated Risks We make dozens -- if not hundreds -- of choices every day and with very little time devoted to considering the risks were taking. Whether we choose to wear a helmet on a bike ride or we decide to take out a mortgage, we often base our choices on our emotions, not the true level of risk. Making decisions based on your level of fear isnt an accurate way to calculate risk. Emotions are often irrational and unreliable. You dont get to be extraordinary without taking risks, and learning how to accurately calculate risk will ensure youre making the best choices. 7. Dwell on the Past While reflecting on the past and learning from it is a helpful part of building mental strength, ruminating can be harmful. Making peace with the past so you can live for the present and plan for the future can be hard, especially if youve endured a lot of misfortune, but its a necessary step in becoming your best self. 8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over Itd be nice to learn enough from each mistake that wed be guaranteed to never repeat that same mistake twice. But the reality is that were prone to repeat the same mistakes sometimes. Learning from our mistakes requires humility and a willingness to look for new strategies to become better. Mentally strong people dont hide their mistakes or make excuses for them, instead they use them as opportunities for self-growth. 9. Resent Other Peoples Success Watching a co-worker receive a promotion or hearing a friend talk about her achievements can stir up feelings of envy. But resenting other peoples success will only interfere with your ability to reach your own goals. When youre secure in our own definition of success, youll stop envying other people for obtaining their goals and youll be committed to reaching your dreams. 10. Give Up After Failure Its normal to feel embarrassed, discouraged, and downright defeated when your first attempts dont work. From a young age, were often taught that failure is bad, but its nearly impossible to succeed if you never fail. Mentally strong people view failure as proof that theyre pushing themselves to the limits in their efforts to reach their full potential. 11. Fear Alone Time In todays fast paced world, obtaining a little quiet time often takes a concerted effort. Many people avoid silence and solitude because the lack of activity feels uncomfortable. But time to yourself is an essential component to building mental strength. Mentally strong people create opportunities to be alone with their thoughts, reflect on their progress, and create goals for the future. 12. Feel the World Owes Them Anything Its easy to get caught up in feeling a sense of entitlement. But waiting for the world -- or the people in it -- to give you what you think were owed isnt a helpful life strategy. If youre busy trying to take what you think you deserve, you wont have any time to focus on all that you have to give. And everyone has gifts that can be shared, regardless of whether theyve gotten a fair deal in life. 13. Expect Immediate Results Wouldnt it be nice if everything in life could happen at the touch of a button? We often grow so accustomed to our no lines, no waiting world, that our brains begin to believe that everything should happen instantaneously. But self-growth develops at more of a snails pace, rather than at lightning speed. Whether youre trying to lose weight or develop a more gracious attitude, slow and steady wins the race and expecting immediate results will only lead to disappointment. Mentally strong people know that true change takes time and theyre willing to work hard to see results. The good news is, everyone has the ability to build mental strength. But to do so, you need to develop self-awareness about the self-destructive thoughts, behaviors, and feelings that prevent you from reaching your full potential. Once you recognize areas that need work, committing to mental strength exercises will help you create healthier habits and build mental muscle.
Posted on: Fri, 19 Dec 2014 23:58:27 +0000
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