Hi fri - day, super summer sets in ...:) :) I got divorced due to unforeseen circumstances beyond my control. I feel my biological clock is ticking away but I have not yet met anyone I wish to marry. This is worrying me so much that I am unable to concentrate on my work (I am well-qualified professional earning good money) and I become very depressed often. I go to the gym, walk, dance, meet friends, but nothing seems to help. My peer group is busy raising families whereas I am all alone. Seeker. Deepak chopra reply :- I am sympathetic to your situation and would like to offer practical solutions, so I will have to be a little blunt. When you list the things you do such as going to the gym and being with friends, you name externals only. What about the inner healing that needs to be done? You are not prepared yet to wed again, because divorce, whatever happens in the outer world, is a huge inner shock leading to lasting wounds. Because of your unhealed state, you are tender to being hurt. No one looks good enough in your eyes because our perception is dominated by the past. I don’t mean necessarily that you constantly relive the past, but it would be quite natural if you did. For most people, the breakup of a marriage stirs up many feelings, covering guilt, shame, insecurity, self-esteem, and so on. First and foremost, you need to pay attention to self-care. This means gently attending to your own healing while building up yourself based on what you feel good about. It’s a two-pronged approach. You need a therapist, confidante, or mentor who has successfully guided his own life, or the life of a patient, through the healing you need. Also, you need to become more comfortable in your inner world. Right now, it’s not a place you want to spend time in. Depression arises because you aren’t connected with the positive side of your inner world. Try to engage in the following, choosing the avenues that most appeal to you: meditation, Hatha Yoga, contemplation, mindfulnesss practice, keeping a journal, and relaxation techniques. These avenues help to reconnect you with your inner world without dwelling on unpleasant memories and old wounds. The goal is simple but has many rewards: Exchange tension for relaxation. Learn that you can rest easy in who you are. Then you will find your inner life more appealing, and form your new state of relaxed, open feelings the next phase of your life will unfold naturally. deepakchopra content resource – speakingtree
Posted on: Fri, 28 Mar 2014 02:43:38 +0000
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