Hi guys, I am facing a bit of a difficulty in football at the moment. I am going to write my football story and I will try to make it as interesting as possible for you to read in the hope that you will give me some advice. I really appreciate your effort if you read all of this and help me out. I would do the same! :) I started playing football when I was 9 - when I moved to a new country, Ireland. Before that I had never kicked a ball before. I went for one training session when I was 6 but I was poor and wasnt encouraged to come back. Everyone else in my area had started playing football when they were 3 or 4 so they were obviously a lot more advanced and way better than me, But since I was 6 I watched my favourite team play (Manchester United) and watched Ronaldinho for Barcelona and his Joga Bonito videos on YouTube. All of this inspired me to go outside and practice. I lived in an isolated area with no kids around pretty much. So once I went outside for the first time to play when I was 9, I was instantly hooked. I practiced nearly all day every day from that moment on. It was hard to practice because my back yard was all kind of made of concrete and lots of stones but I got on with it. I had a goal and some days I would spend just all day taking shots. I also started to do build up my physicality when I was 9 doing some body weight exercises to build up my strength as I was small for my age. So with that and practicing nearly all day at home and at school because in our school we didnt really do work at all, the teachers just always let us go outside and play football, I re-joined a team when I was 9. At the beginning I went in goals because I was far behind technically. I was still behind obviously because the other kids had been playing since they were 3 or 4 on a team and me (new to team) just had been practicing a lot for a while. I was always on the bench but once I started a game and I scored 3 goals and it was the greatest feeling of my life. During the season and when the season ended in the summer, that game gave me even more determination to go and keep practicing and getting better - and I did, I started working harder than ever and enjoyed it more than ever (thank god because there was literally nothing to do in my isolated area like I said). I came back the following season and oh my God, it was like a new me. The first game of the season the coach started me as a striker and showed belief. I scored 2 goals and it was amazing. From then on the players showed me more and more respect as the games went on. Giving me the ball at every opportunity because I was fast and we were only 10 playing on a full size field. So any ball played through to me over the top, I would get and score. So the following game was the exact same, I scored 2 goals and the parents applauded my hard working performance as striker when I came off to be rested. The next game again, 2 goals - amazing form for me and my confidence was obviously sky high. The following game was more interesting - the opposition were a lot tougher than the other teams we had played. I scored 1 goal in the first half. In the second half we were leading 2-1 and just about holding on. I was put through and normally I would eat up these types of chances but I missed this one by a lot. I was frustrated but got on with the game and believed that I could make up for it. I then scored a left footed volley and made it 3-1. I didnt celebrate at all because I was still angry haha. Then I received the ball 30 yards out in the final few minutes and struck it with power into the top right corner to seal my hat trick - what a turn around. The rest of the season was amazing, I scored sometimes 5 or 6 goals in one half. We ended up coming 2nd in the league (I scored 3 goals against the 1st team to beat them 3-2 the first game but the second game we lost 7-0, an off day for our whole team). I ended up scoring 30 or 40 goals that season which was the greatest thing for me and meant the world. Just 1 year of constant practice and I was one of the best on the team and the top scorer. I got the most improved player at the end of the season because people recognized me improvement. I think another reason why I done so well that season was because our team played division 2 (the worst division in the country). So then I kept on practicing for the following season in the summer. At the start of that season I was 11 and my Mom moved me to a new school because she noticed the old one I hardly done any education and just played football. In the new school there was no football played. But we finished at 2:30pm so I would play after that and all day on holidays etc. So the start of the season was amazing. We got promoted to division 1 and I again improved a lot! At the start of the season I was playing striker again. And not just bagging goals like last season, but also assisting a lot using my pace. So the first half of the season was great - I was top scorer, one of the top assistors and we won most of our games. But in the second half of the season something changed. I think that I started taking football a bit to serious and I started to invite some serious pressure on myself to perform unbelievably. I was always watching the likes on Maradona and Messi and wanted to play like them. At that moment football was my life. So in the second half of the season if I made any mistakes or anything like that I would be really down on myself and I would destroy my self confidence. I still would have some good games but they werent as natural as before and I wasnt scoring as much. I think it might be because someone said something to me that really affected me confidence but I cant remember. In the final game of the season it was the division 1 title decider and I choked, badly. The coached and parents were counting on my to replicate my previous form but coming into the game I was so nervous and so under pressure, I had never gone to a game to feel like that, I think it might have been because I started taking football to serious. I had my worst game because I was scared and my touch was off. I got substituted at the start of the second half and cried on my way home. The following season I felt that all I needed to fix this was a change in clubs, so I viewed the best team in the top division (the team I was playing for were in division 1). I watched their games and decided to take on the challenge. Their A team (best team) were in the top division and their B team were in division 2. So I went to the A team trials and absolutely smashed it (scored 5 or 6 goals against the A team players and played one of my best games ever overall). So the coaches were instantly interested in me joining. The first game of the season I started and scored and play ok. The next few games I didnt start much but made great impact when coming off the bench. They trained 3 times a week and I continued with my never ending practicing but now more so with friends because I moved houses because of school but I still trained a lot on my own down at the pitch. I worked really hard and started a few games. In the first game that I started I scored 3 goals. Then the following game I started again and scored one of the best goals I have ever scored - a volley into the top left corner from 30 yards out (crossbar and in). I didnt play that well though but the goal meant we won 4-3. Then the following game I started again and scored one of the goals of the season again. All of the players told me after the game how good I have become and how much I improved since I came. But then again in the second half of the season the coaches stopped playing me at all for some reason (I think because the coaches son told the coach to play all of his best friends). So he destroyed my confidence and basically for the second half of the season it ended just like the second half of the previous season - in tears and my confidence wrecked. This never effected my confidence when playing with friends or training on my own, just with my team. What I loved about myself is when I didnt play and was upset I didnt lock myself in my room and do nothing. I always went outside and practiced more, to try to prove them wrong. The following season I went back to my old team and quit that team. I didnt like a lot of the players and how the spoke and treated me and I especially didnt like the coaches and what they do to players like me because their son is on the team (the whole club have a history of being very very abusive to players and even though they are a successful club, they are hated by many). I kind of snuck away without telling the new coach or any of the players, my Dad just sent a text to the new coach and I told like 3 players. I think I developed an issue on that team physiologically. I think looking back now I maybe should of stayed just to train in that professional environment because going back down to division 1 was a step backward. So I think I was 12 and I returned to my old team. I think most of the players were happy to see me back, some even begged me to come back before that. Even the ones that called me a traitor were happy to see me back. So I came back a bit cocky. I was hoping to be a star like I was before, scoring goals left right & centre, but that wasnt the case. The first game back we were missing half of the team so we lost by a lot but I played well and worked hard. But for the rest of the season I only ended up scoring 3 goals. Again I think it was the problem with confidence and I expecting myself to play like Messi because of all of the practice I was putting in and because it was a lower division. Most of the season was just pure and utter frustration. The old midfielder that assisted most of my 40 goals that season was no longer the player he was and was replaced by another centre midfielder who I absolutely hate. All he did was try to beat the whole team by himself and any time I would make a run and I was straight through which was my specialty before he would never pass and try to run the pitch. I told him many times to start passing and so did the coaches sometimes. But he never changed and the coaches started subbing me off in the second half of games a lot for a sub striker instead of subbing this glory hunter off because they rated him so highly. At training and in games I still played well but just not scoring goals for days because this c**t never passed the ball and I really couldnt do much up top without the ball. One highlight of that season was the final game of the season. We were in semi-final of a Cup and were playing against a Premier Division Side (the division above us). Our coaches were missing that game so we were coached by our old coaches (the ones that coached me when I scored the 40 goals). So I went into the game a but nervous just like always but so pumped up because I knew that the coaches would give good instructions to try to use my pace. Also some of the team that left old players moved to this team because they were unhappy just like I was so I wanted to show them what I got. So I scored a screamer in the opening 10 minutes, it was my 3rd goal only of the whole year but it meant so much I felt like crying (a massive relief off my shoulders and a reward for my hard work). In the first half I also won a penalty and assisted another goal. I was running riot up front. Playing killer passes, running past players, scoring that goal - it was awesome. By the end we lost 4-3 unfortunately. I was praised my the other teams parents as they went up to my step dad and said how well I played and that the old team really did ruin me. Also the my coach was happy with my performance and I was happy to (just upset that we didnt win as I have never won any cup/trophy in my life). I was hoping that that team might as me to join their ranks but they didnt. In school the players from the other team were saying to me how good my goal was and stuff like that which was awesome. I think another reason why I played so well was because that team that we played had beaten my old team in the quarter-final and believe me, I was so scared to play my old team the season that I left I was willing to fake injury just to not be seen. I think it was because I left quietly and I had an issue somewhere there like I said. The following season I stayed with my team and we got put into the Premier Division with my old team (I was shitting it). We got a few new players that I was hoping could help me face my difficulty of playing the ball through to me instead of that guy glorying the whole time. So we were on a 8 game win streak and I was playing well amazing. I played amazing against that team we lost to 4-3 in the cup. We won 3-2 this time and I scored. The glory hunter was playing left midfielder so that might be one of the reason , I was getting a lot of the ball. Then the following game I scored an amazing last minute goal to win the game 2-1, it was an amazing feeling. And I also scored 5 goals in one game in a cup match. Then came the decisive game, against my old team. We ended up losing 5-0 and they were surprised because we were on a 8 game win streak (8 wins out of 8 games). I choked that game and didnt show enough aggression. I also had no confidence for some reason and missed a good opportunity at 0-0. One of the players told me I played well when I got subbed off which was nice of him. I was very down. For the rest of that season I seemed to have lost my scoring touch. Only scoring 1 goal for the rest of the season in the league and in 3 different cups. I only assisted a lot and worked non-stop as a striker as we played 4-5-1. The glory guy was back at centre midfield and I was left just chasing for the whole 90 minutes up front while he just gloried and sometimes cost us the game. I still played well and everyone acknowledged me hard work and assists but I missed so many goal scoring chances it was crazy. I think I took football to serious and my confidence in-game was so low. I practiced shooting everyday and scored in training. But in game I started to choke. If I scored a goal it would sometimes be hard to remember it because in-game would seem blurry and different its hard to explain. We then came up against my old team again in one of the cups and only lost 3-1. I had a brilliant performance. Getting the assist and really rattling their defence and always beating players and closing them down and winning the ball. We then came up against them in another cup and lost 3-0. I choked and had a bad game when people were depending on me. The glory hunter also missed 3 open goals which I feel also contributed to us losing. We were all over them and should of won. I think I might of also been so nervous because one of my best friends that I trained with a lot came to watch me play and I was obviously eager to impress. I was so down on myself after the game because I felt because of me I wont win a trophy again. And I still havent. I then told the team that I am moving to California for a year. So I was out of the coaches plans as I was leaving and he completely dumped all I had done in the season and didnt start me for the next 2 games. In the last one I had came on and made a massive difference and nearly brought my team back into it. I ran the pitch and nearly scored a screamer. I left the team pissed off and again in tears. But that summer I had amazing news. I got trials for an MLS team (San Jose Earthquakes U16 Youth Academy. I trained all summer with all I got and saw it as a fresh start. I was training with Dylans Play Like A Pro Ebook and his Confidence Ebook. I also participated in summer competitions against the best premier players and I destroyed them as a centre midfielder and they all thought I was great. So for the summer I prepared for the trials which were in August. Not wasting a minute of the summer. Using the training program in Dylans ebook and trying to get my confidence sorted out. I went to California with massive improvement and with good confidence. At the first trial I played great as a right midfielder and was invited for more trials. But for the rest of the trials I played as a striker and the competition was a bit of too big step up and my confidence again lacked and I didnt end up making it. That didnt stop my hunger to try to become good enough to make it to that professional academy level. So I joined a team in the NPL which is the top soccer league in America and they arent far off academy level. I have no school for a year so I basically just practice all day - a do gym work to improve my strength, speed and power as I am not tall for my age, I got it from Dylans Ebook. I have futsal training twice a week. I train 3 or 4 times a week with my club. I do gym 5 times a week. I train on my own with Dylans training program. And I also have a football YouTube channel from which I make money from and I will soon be sponsored so that is a cool hobby. So I practiced so much at the start of the season, tiring myself out sometimes. I didnt start that much but I made some great appearances when coming off the bench for my new team. I felt like I deserve to start because I play really good at training and I work hard. Some of the players said Im one of the best there but the problem is we have 7 forwards and I am a forward and we play 4-3-3 so only 3 of the forwards can start. I think the coach isnt starting me much because he wants to be loyal to the players that have been at the team since they were 4 as I am only here for a year and he realises that. I had this one amazing game this year when we only had 12 players and we benched. He brought me on after 20 minutes and I played the rest of the game and the guys said it was the performance of the season. I played right wing in the 4-3-3 and I bet my man every time. I made assists. It was just one of them games that we all have sometimes where are on fire. I then scored one of the best goals that I have ever scored and they said it is the goal of the season so far. I got the ball in our half. I bet like 5 or 6 players with dummys and skill rather than pace (what I usually beat people with) and I got to the edge of their box and typically layed it off but my team mate flicked it up to me and I scored an amazing scissors kick at the edge of the box. It was the greatest feeling. Every player celebrated with me and every went crazy, lol. We ended up winning 4-2 and my goal made it 2-1. Some parents after the game told me about how good I played so that was amazing. I also play for the u19 of my club, all of that info above was about the u17 team. But after that game my coached didnt want to continue my streak of confidence and benched me for the next 2 games and brought me on and I played well. But I just dont get what I have to do to get a regular starting spot when the mid fielders even say that I should be starting and that I am better than most of the 7 forwards on the team? I just dont get it and I feel discouraged. My season ended in November as its high school season and the local school wouldnt let me play because I dont go to their school and they changed their policies about not letting local players that do home school play. So since the season ended in November I have lost my love of training and have slanted towards my YouTube career a lot. In YouTube it just takes a few months of hard work and you get instant results. In football I have been working my ass off since I was 9 and now I am 16 (nearly 17). All I do these days is the gym 5 times a week which I love, freestyle football training everyday for my YouTube videos. Futsal training twice a week which is so fun. And I made 2-4 videos a week for my YouTube channel which is like I said - so rewarding. So if you are still reading I am really happy. I seem to have lost the love of football for some reason. It may be because of the YouTube career. Or now my low confidence again on the pitch because of my team (Dylans ebook hasnt helped to fix it) or it might be because football is like a full time thing for me because I have no school. It also might be because I only do serious training and I dont play fun kick about matches like I did with all of my friends back in Ireland. Also I am not feeling hunger like I used to to progress in Dylans training program in Play Like A Pro and I feel like it has stopped improving me and I need a new program as I have been using it for like 6 months. It took a lot of time & emotion to write this guys. I have 7 months or so with no school and I am determined to get my football training back on track and fulfill my ambition on become a professional footballer because it is what I love best and what I love watching and playing. Someone please help me try to get my love for the beautiful game back and to try to get that confidence on the pitch and hunger to train seriously again. Any help is appreciated, Cheers
Posted on: Mon, 05 Jan 2015 23:11:02 +0000
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