Hmmmm...its not a wise thing daring the authorities but it sure felt so darn good weaving between two road safety officials on a free Lagos motorway, err...figured they needed to see how good I took my obstacles course, hehehehehe...But heck, no way was I gon stop when two of em raised there hands by random selection while edging into the middle of the wonderfully wide road headed to Oshodi... Chaiiiiiiiiiii...exactly at the same spot two Sundays ago under the very same circumstances! Semblances? Kids in the car, husby on call again, two frsc guys on random selections and we were doing a jéjé easy-does-it 40-60. Difference? Today Husby want the one drivin!...And between the two both of us he has always been the kinder obedient one behind wheels...okay thats being wise but heck those guys p..sd me pieces last time them hands went up in the air on the same spot of the same Day in the same friggin city garbed in the same fine Brownies and ugly-ass cap...abi na modified beret!...They were welcome to gimme Chase o....but figured they wouldnt anyways....What amused me eventually?, I was too busy sporting a huge blind-spot expression to avoid ramming an official to notice, was when husby grinned beside me and went youre joking...He was referring to the shell-shocked official whom he tells me was gaping somewhat dazed at the car as he had obviously expected me to stop since I had appeared to slow down a twit toward the side he had pointed...but then had just breezed by maintaining same speed cos I wasnt going to appear like I had intended to trick em, heck no, they wouldnt get that satisfaction off of me, i just hissed looking up at the overhead rear view mirror and mumbled, let them chase me if they want...thats all they can now accuse me of, the naija crime of refusing to be fleeced yet again on the same Spot! Whew! End of year Demo! I had my heart partially in my chest all the while O! But it felt so darn Good! Hmmmm, e fà mí létí O! Somebody better pull my ear O! I just hope it doesnt become a habit, this is my second time daring frsc guys O, and first time, it was just me manning Butch and almost ran the guy down...as in, actually edging the guy forward with the car, smack in the middle of the road while he was banging on the bonnet and yelling at me half-authoritatively and half-mortified at the look on my face behind the wheels with my darkest bones perched on my nose and the mother of all frowns knitting up my severely vengeful Brows. He had then resorted to yelling at his colleagues who were busy fleecing other vehicles to give me chase as I refused to stop and I guess they probably thought he was being foolishly melodramatic with an obviously unwilling victim...boy did they Know! Their Offence each time? Irreverent milking of very scarce resources under the guise of very flimsy Issues and making me feel like an ass when they fly weird looking papers in my face with a long list of fees I would be made to pay if I end up in their Office! There is a reason I make sure my papers and everything else I could be asked to produce by relevant authorities to prove I have a right to kick Butch onto a nigerian Road! Last time the guy collected my very up to date papers, and he didnt even look at em well cos why else would he be accusing me of having expired papers with 2015 in bold Print! And when I pointed that out he went after my drivers Permit! Ntorí Hábà! Drivers permit even after showing him a drivers license that their very office had issued me after much stress to ensure I was no danger to other motorists and it wont even expire next Year! When they begin to look for other unreasonable however relevant reasons to milk my pocket, and this is most times the case, not usually wise, I hate being bitten twice...And though me thinks I have watched one too many episodes of fast and Furious, I will front no remorse next time even if one em decides to give chase and I fall my own hand, disappoint my accomplice...Butch, my sweet ever-willing, ever responsive vehicle...and get Nabbed! No way am I gon be repentant thank You!
Posted on: Sun, 28 Dec 2014 17:00:22 +0000