How do I write the longings of my heart; the knowledge that courses through my very soul, my body, my heart/mind of my love for you? Never has anyone captured my heart, my imagination, my passion the way you have. Never have I felt so close to another human being on so many levels as I do with you. Never have I been as content, at ease in a relationship, as I am with ours. I think perhaps that is the key word in the last sentence. This is OUR relationship. We share everything. We talk about everything together. The good, the bad, the mediocre – we don’t shy away, we don’t hide from each other. The time for the ‘newness’ of all of this is long past and we are still madly in love. I marvel at this love. Saying/writing this seems so ‘trite’ so cliché, so ‘it’s all been said before’ and perhaps it has – but truly you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’ve been on this planet for a while now… Perhaps it’s just in the way that you and I are able to be ourselves around each other – we don’t pretend, we don’t put on a façade – it’s all so very real, so honest – as if you are the very breath within my body, so close to me, that you are almost of an involuntary nature. That’s not to say that I don’t want to be cognizant or that I am becoming complacent – it is a statement about how comfortable this has become and how surprising it is that I’ve been able to just let go with you – let my guard down. Be myself. We have had ups and downs and things that (at least to me) are important in the sense of ‘how will we handle our future’? We have been through things that would have destroyed other romances but not ours. You are still the one that I want to spend most of my time with, you are still a ‘turn-on’ for me, you still make me blush, you still challenge me & make me think, you are in every way I can sense and feel, my own personal. I know deep down this is how it’s suppose to feel with love; this is how a healthy relationship works, in the same way that I know with everything that I am – that I want to spend the rest of my life with you as my love(r), my partner, my wife. Always & forever yours, You are out there and I want you. I want to smile lovingly at you and tell you that you are wonderful. I want to caress your face and touch your shoulder and smooth your neck as I go by. I want to tell you in a million ways how deeply I love your scent, your touch, your voice. I love you and want to do everything for you. I want to follow you anywhere in the world and be yours forever. I want to be old beside you and sometimes have nothing to say. I want to feel you in my heart, my mind, my soul. I want to know you and yet always be learning you. I want to long for you when we are far apart like now and know that you are also longing for me. I want to know that when a love song plays that it is pail compared to our love. I love the idea of you and I want to love you. Why does it seem to be that I find the words to say long after we’ve departed? I don’t understand it. When you gave me that hug on Tuesday, all I wanted was for you to never let go…but I didn’t realize it until I was home. Do you remember how we met? Ofcourse you do. It would have been certainly easier to meet while we were studying at the same seniour(MSSS), but by chance – or maybe by destiny – we were supposed to meet on a very different location. It almost sounds like a fairy tale. With you I experienced the deepest, strongest, most amazing feelings (both love and lust related). I gave myself away in a way I never imagined possible without regreting a single moment. Because of you I have searched better things for me in life. Even better than I was used to before. After I met you I was able to have a new perspective in life. I really recognize how much I am worth now. When you treated me so perfectly I felt like the best person alive. You made me fall in love with words, thoughts and beauty again, just when I thought I would never do so again. You showed me what it’s like to trust someone, to have someone who loves me with all my flaws and troubles, to know someone I don’t ever get bored of talking to… Life isn’t perfect for us, and it probably never will be, no matter how much we change or rock the boat, but I know at least I have you, and with that, know that I’m happy. I never thought I’d find you… but I did, and I cannot imagine ever living without you. You make my 23 years here on earth worth the crazy journey. And now my future is with you. No distance is too great, if it means I can call you Babe and say you are my own. You make every ounce of my being tingle. You make my heart dance. You make…me happy. I’m proud to love you. I’m blessed by the heavens to be loved by you. And I share this with the world. Ndo kuda kwaso kwaso nthuwangu.
Posted on: Fri, 12 Jul 2013 01:52:28 +0000