How to Forget a Guy Nobody said that forgetting about a guy you care about will be easy – or fun. But the sooner you decide to accept that the guy has no place in your future, the sooner you can start to put him in the past, where he belongs. To forget about a guy, you have to give yourself time to heal, remind yourself that you’re better off alone, and enjoy the comfort of your friends and family. If you want to start forgetting about the guy today and to move on with your life, then follow along. 1 Give yourself time to get over him. If you really want to forget a guy, then the first thing you have to do is give yourself time for a mourning period. As silly as it sounds, the sooner you admit that you need some time to be on your own, to think about what happened, and to deal with your emotions, the sooner you’ll be able to move on. Whether you dated the guy or just really, really liked him, you should let your emotions loose and admit that you’re not going to be okay for a little while. This doesn’t mean you’re being weak by any means. In fact, it takes strength to admit that you’re not feeling so strong. Let your friends know that you’re upset. There’s no need to fake happiness, which will take up more of your energy anyway. If you don’t feel like going for a while, that’s fine. Though you shouldn’t wallow by yourself for too long, there’s nothing wrong with staying in for a few days – or a few weeks. Write your feelings down in a journal. This can help you deal with your emotions without sharing them with the world. 2 Focus on the bad qualities when you think of him. When you’re trying to forget a guy, it’s easy to romanticize the situation and imagine that the guy was absolutely gorgeous, hilarious, brilliant, and generally amazing instead of facing the reality of the situation. If you’re trying to forget him, then chances are that he’s a jerk or that he’s just not right for you. So, the next time you think about his killer smile, remind yourself of the mean things he said to you or picture him in that terrible leather jacket he insists on wearing. Make a list of all of the terrible things about the guy if you have to. Carry it around with you and look it over any time you’re feeling weak. If you really think that the guy is perfect, then chances are that you don’t know him very well after all. 3 Remember why you’re not with him. There must be a pretty good reason why you’re not together. Maybe he cheated on you. Maybe he wasn’t that interested to begin with. Maybe it turned out that you just weren’t as compatible as you hoped. Or maybe you felt passionately for each other, but you couldn’t spend more than ten minutes in the same room without fighting. Whatever the reason, it must have been a good one, so remind yourself that there’s a perfectly good explanation for why you’re not together. Any time you feel like you really need him, just remember all the bad times you shared together. Do you really want any more of that? It’s easy to look at the past with rose-colored glasses and to tell yourself that you and the guy were absolutely perfect together. In reality, there must have been many less-than- ideal moments that you spent together, or you’d still be standing hand-in-hand, wouldn’t you? 4 Let go of regret. You may be feeling regret for a number of reasons. Maybe you wish you had been a better girlfriend. Maybe you wish that you had let the guy see that you liked him as much as you did. Maybe you think you were too distant and that the guy lost interest. Whatever you think you did wrong, chances are that it’s all in your head. And even if you really did make a mistake, it’s too late to go back and fix it, so don’t waste your time worrying about it. Look at it this way: maybe you made some mistakes with this guy, but you can’t go back into the past to change them. However, it wasn’t for nothing – you can learn from these mistakes and feel more mature and level- headed when you enter your next relationship. 5 Forget those bitter feelings. Bitterness is another negative feeling that will only make you miserable, angry, and devoid of compassion. You may be feeling bitter because of how it ended, feeling like you were mistreated, or just thinking that you have horrible luck in life and that everything is unfair. You know where those feelings will get you? Absolutely nowhere. So kick those bitter feelings to the curb whenever you feel them creeping up. Learn to recognize those bitter feelings. Whenever you feel one bitter sentiment coming on, fight it with at least three positive thoughts. Sure, you may be thinking of something horrible the guy did to you, but fight that feeling by remembering three amazing, unforgettable things that your friends or family members have done for you recently. You can always find something to be happy about if you try hard enough. 7 Pump yourself up. If you’re trying to forget a guy, then you’re probably not feeling like a rockstar. You may think you’re ugly, fat, stupid, unworthy, or just plain boring. These feelings are perfectly natural, but that doesn’t mean they are accurate at all. Don’t let whatever the dumb guy did bring you down, and remember to love yourself on your own terms. Think about the things you loved about yourself the most before you met the guy – can you return to them? Make a list of your favorite qualities and show them off. Build your confidence up until you see that you are an amazing person, whether you’re with the guy or not. 8 Be grateful for what you do have. If you just ended a relationship or a tricky situation for a guy, then your first impulse probably won’t be to be thankful for all that you have. However, this is precisely what will get you out of that same negative mindset and what will make you remember all of the wonderful things that your life has to offer. Make a mental or physical list of all of the things you have to be grateful for: your family, your friends, your health, your opportunities, your surroundings, your pet cat, Mr. Snookums. Pretty soon, you’ll see that your life is pretty great, even if the guy isn’t in it. Write down all of the things you have to be grateful for and add to your list whenever you think of something new. Read over the list every now and again whenever you need to cheer yourself up. You’ll see that your life is well worth living without the guy, and he will slowly fade out of the picture.
Posted on: Thu, 23 Oct 2014 11:22:35 +0000
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