I CAME ACROSS THIS ON ADOPTEE RIGHTS NEWS BLOG CANTON - TopicsExpress



          

I CAME ACROSS THIS ON ADOPTEE RIGHTS NEWS BLOG CANTON REPOSITORY January 27, 2008 40 years of separation: Woman seeks last of 6 siblings split by adoption Sunday, January 27, 2008 By FELLICIA SMITH REPOSITORY STAFF WRITER tterson and Peffer had been separated from their other four siblings — John (the youngest), Jackie and Jim (the twins) and George. All had been adopted after being taken from their parents for neglect and abuse in 1964. “They did separate siblings then; it wasn’t uncommon,” said Jayne Schooler, an author of books on adoption and searching for lost siblings. “It was easier for placement purposes. They do a better job of keeping them together now.” Patterson and Peffer, the oldest of the six children, bounced between foster care homes and the Fairmount Children’s Home throughout the 1960s. When Patterson, who was 12, and Peffer, 11, were separated, it was the final time Patterson would see her siblings for nearly 20 years. “I cried because I missed my brothers and sisters so much,” Patterson said. “Eventually I stopped crying, and that worried me.” Today, Patterson has reunited with four of her brothers and sisters except for Peffer. Her whereabouts remain a mystery, one Patterson has labored for years to solve. “I think we need to add Cindy to the picture because it’s not complete,” Patterson said. “I know my brothers and sisters would love that. I’m determined to find her, one way or another.” SEARCHING Patterson’s search took her to Ashland in December. A 50-year-old Cindy L. Peffer lives there. She couldn’t track down the woman. Disappointing, yes. But Patterson is back on the hunt. “I need to find Cindy,” said Patterson, 51. “I will find her.” Patterson, who works at Leno’s Family Restaurant in Plain Township, has spent hours looking through public records. She and her other sister, Jackie Grafe Senften, have scoured area yearbooks in search of a familiar face. She has signed up for the Ohio Adoption Registry, which has the names of 13,000 adoptees, so if Peffer is searching, she could access Patterson’s vital information. Patterson has paid companies to trace Peffer, though it didn’t help. And Patterson has talked to other former foster children from their stint at Fairmount in the 1960s. “The technology that came out in the 1990s really helped,” Patterson said. “I’ve spent tons of money, writing and looking for Cindy. We couldn’t figure out anybody who knew her.” Patterson now has MySpace and Facebook pages. She’s signed up on dozens of adoption registries. She gets daily alerts from other organizations that help siblings search for siblings. She’s considering hiring a company to do an age progression photo, one that might give her an idea what Cindy looks like today. John Kuhn, Patterson’s youngest brother who was adopted at 2, isn’t actively searching for Cindy but supports Patterson. “She pretty much takes the lead in it,” Kuhn said from his home in Huntington, Ind. “I wouldn’t even know where to start. My curiosity would be to see the records of our adoptions, the hows and the whys.” Patterson’s determination isn’t surprising to Schooler. “The sibling bond can be the longest bond between people,” Schooler said. “Even when they’re taken away, you know something is missing, a part of you is missing. So you do search.” Most records are sealed; available information on an adopted sibling is scarce. Adoption agencies estimate that millions of siblings are searching for each other. The Cleveland Adoption Network even hosts workshops and seminars on the topic. All Patterson has to go on is a birth certificate for Cindy from Aultman Hospital and photos of them as children. It’s not much, but those and her memories are enough to keep Patterson from quitting. “We’re getting older,” Patterson said. “How long before one of us goes? I’d like to take one more picture of us.” THE REUNION Patterson knows there is a chance she’ll find her sister. Her other four biological siblings found each other and eventually her. Kuhn and his older brother, George Frame, were the first to reconnect. “It wasn’t talked about much,” Kuhn said of his adoption and separation from his biological siblings. “When I met George, I was close to 16. He came to the house. “My dad didn’t know how to say it — he just said, ‘This is your brother.’ I was like, ‘OK.’ I wasn’t real receptive. I think it’s hard.” It was the elder brother who found the twins, Jackie Grafe Senften and Jim Endinger. “George met Jim and Jackie before I did,” recalled Kuhn, 45. “I was about 22 when I met Jim and Jackie. They lived in a burg by Dalton.” Less than a year later, they found Patterson. It was 1985. They all met for the first time in Massillon. The only one missing was Peffer. “That’s an open part of my life,” Kuhn said. “It would make it complete to meet her. You never know how other people feel. I don’t know about her life experiences, but I don’t want anything from her but to meet her.” That 1985 meeting was joyous. The siblings learned they each grew up in Stark County, only miles apart. They tried to keep in touch and managed to succeed most of the time. “The initial excitement is great, but it wears off,” Patterson said of the 1985 reunion. “We’ve been working on it the last 20 years.” Today, Patterson said she can call any of her siblings, but there are times they go months without talking. Patterson and Frame are the only siblings still in Stark County. The twins live in Georgia and Kuhn in Indiana. “You have to start back as friends,” Patterson said. “You pray to God you like each other. We’ve had our problems with each other. We’re grown up, and we weren’t raised together. We have different values. We butt heads, but we try to keep it together. We’ve already spent too much time apart.” The search for Cindy is a big part of Patterson’s life, but she knows she might never find her. “That would be the highlight of my life,” Patterson said, “to see my sister.” Reach Repository writer Fellicia Smith at or e-mail: fellicia.smith@cantonrep To contact Kim Patterson, e-mail her at: patterson.kimberly@gmail
Posted on: Mon, 07 Jul 2014 21:52:04 +0000

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