I Do Part 2 Understanding makes you respect your spouses desires and respecting makes you accept your spouse as he/she is. This makes you sign a peace treaty with yourself. Yes, firstly you are responsible of your life. If you agreed to tie a knot with someone that means you are ready to share your life with that person. It is not only about yourself but someone elses. Have you tried walking with one shoe? Hadiths report that not to walk with one shoe/Sandal for shaitan walks with one sandal. But still even as a kid you might have tried walking with a shoe. How have you felt? Comfortable? Marriage is something similar. If you preferred giving preference only to your needs, desires and feelings you will never feel comfortable with such a marriage. Both of you are like your two legs. You cannot prefer wearing only one shoe and letting the other be without. It causes trouble only to you. This is understanding, understanding the need of the other and understanding the differences of the other. Remember that both of you are not from the same gender. And remember though you are counted as one still you are two different persons. Your likes and your spouses differ and it is not necessary for him or her to think the way you think. Ponder for a moment, keep in mind that you didnt marry to yourself. So stop expecting your spouse to be identical to you. For an example you might be a neat freak and your spouse is just the opposite. You cant bear seeing your house being messed for your attitudes are tailing ever since you were born. So is your spouses. It might irritate seeing your spouses attitude but remember same could be felt from the other side. So stop feeling offended. Perhaps you are the one who is offending the other. Quarreling is common. Pointing out a mistake is not wrong. But dont make it a habit. It is not healthy for a good relationship. Have you played see saw? Both persons cannot be on top at the same time. So differences wont make your life difficult. It only helps you to balance your life. Once you are ready to understand the differences and the needs of the other person it becomes easy to accept your spouse as he or she is. Accepting him/her as they are make you fall in love with the things you disliked to see in someone else. When you fall in love with your imperfect spouse (none of us are perfect), you learn to take things easy. Learning to take things easy keeps you away from being stressed. This results to have a cheerful you. This pleasant you will make your spouse happy. If you need an example let me explain this way. I know women work hard as homemakers. It is the most tiresome job I guess. I know we tend to complain and mourn. But still end of the day what is to be done is done by our own hands. So why not try to omit the mourning part and do with a smile realizing that this work is done for the one who is half of our life? The clothes I wash, the meal I cook and kids I bring up all are a part of the man I love and wanted to share my life with. So why not do it with a smile? We dont live forever, do we? Soon there will be a day that nobody will be there to hear our complains or mournings or perhaps we wont be there to do so. So get rid of the thought being perfect. This life of ours will never be perfect for it is meant to be imperfect so we learn the reality of life. @Zz To read part three visit #IiWords :)
Posted on: Sun, 09 Mar 2014 16:27:03 +0000
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