I am feeling so tender tonight...amazing how grief sneaks in...how the sadness overtakes in a moment. And then I go searching for understanding...perhaps that pattern is my suffering. The pattern of trying so hard to understand with my mind and rational thought the feelings of my heart...perhaps grief is just another messenger from god asking me to come even deeper into my broken open heart. Perhaps sadness is just another texture of love that is more difficult for me to fully surrender to. Perhaps ones soul just needs to weep without understanding, without the cure to fix it, without a reason to explain it away. I am so intimate with grief, have lived a life filled with it and yet I see to where my resistance still plays out at times. I have allowed myself to be cracked open over and over again and yet can I let go even more? Can I trust even deeper and truly free fall into the abyss of pain that I fear will swallow me? Can I descend into the underworld where all that I have lost, all the dreams that have died reside and have faith that I will return with forgiveness and love? Can I fully surrender to it all..... Do not surrender your grief so quickly; let it cut more deeply; let it ferment and season you as few human or divine ingredients can. Something is missing in my heart tonight that has made my eyes so soft and my voice so tender and my need of God so absolutely clear... Hafiz https://youtube/watch?v=sb1MNYy0X7A
Posted on: Tue, 14 Oct 2014 03:27:26 +0000
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