I am not caving into depression. I am walking from advocacy location to advocacy location getting nowhere. Since Monday between the Winton Wellness center in Hayward, Ed Roberts berkley center, and Cyril Hayward I have walked approx 28 miles. I am tired physically and emotional ( yes ) but understandably so. Everywhere I go for help I get referred to another system that isnt willing to listen. Yesterday an advocate said he saw no reason I couldnt be working. I said are you serious he looked un phased in his assessment and my reaction so again I took off my head dressing and said ( pointing to my right side) I have not skull here my hair has grown in so it is hard to see but all I have protecting my brain is a thin layer of skin he dismissed my concerns and had me sign a waiver agreeing not to work with the clinic. So if I am upset or tearful or distressed this is why. My health advocate was assigned to me while I was in a coma and there is a lot I cant remember and why I am still pending with medical and being denied ssi is because my mom was instructed by my health advocate not to complete a specific form. I cant pretend to understand whats going on its maddening. I go out and work for a solution just to get a big fat no and then I get to go to my mom and toms house and think about everything I just wrote about along with recovery from my brain injury. Its beyond overwhelming and yes I cry a lot. But I get up everyday and TRY to find the answer. So please dont assume the worst about my condition I am trying really trying.
Posted on: Fri, 31 Jan 2014 14:11:01 +0000