I am sorry I havent been myself lately, got your pictures to you, posted on the hoot, been a good friend, mother, worker or anything I have failed in lately. I just dont have it in me right now to even know if I am coming or going most days. Its 1am after a long day of being sick, having absolutely no energy at all, no desire to eat for weeks now and to a point of just pure mental exhaustion.....I lay here in bed deep in thought of how much my parents and family has lost in the last 6 months and the devastation my mom and dad has had to go thru, its so not fair. In the last few months my mom has lost a sister and now a brother and my dad lost his younger brother. Thats alot to handle in a short amount of time and I honestly dont know how they have processed it all because I just cant and some days dont want to. You know from the outside, people think oh their loved one passed away, so someone in the family will step up and fill that void but its not all black and white like that. Family either become stronger as a hole and come together or they become very selfish monsters and tear each other a part till there is no family. I did not get the chance to met my gpa and gma Brodrick but I was blessed to have my gpa Brownie and Gma Jessie Crafton in my life. My grandma Jessie was a women of God, and never said a bad word about anyone. My gpa Brownie was the most soft hearted person I knew and cried about good things just as much as bad just like I do! I see my grandparents great qualities in me alot of times and I couldnt be prouder. You know I often ask myself would my grandparents be proud of me for doing that? And I base my decision I make off what I think they would want me to do. In my mind I am still giving them the respect they deserve and try to continue to make them proud. My grandparents were not selfish nor greedy and would both give you their last dime and thats how both of my parents are. They never think of themselves or their needs they do without so others can have what they need. I am sure my gpa and gma Brodrick were equally amazing because they raised 13 amazing children with my mom being the youngest and look how great she turned out. I just wish death didnt bring out the ugly in people, instead make them a stronger better person their family is proud to call......family. Horrible words are said that uncalled for, for what????There is NO AMOUNT of money that I would trade for my family because they are far more important to me then material things. I could use some prayers along with my mom and dad please. Thank you. Really missing my gpa and gma right now wishing they was here. Please dont ask Jeff or anyone else what this is about tomorrow because it is just my thoughts and what I need is prayers not assumptions. Thank you. LET GO AND LET GOD!
Posted on: Thu, 16 Oct 2014 06:06:24 +0000