I am the elephants graveyard for all banjo jokes so I have written a poem about it, in an attempt to out banjo the banjo antagonists... You know who you are Ode to the Banjo Joke Now most of you know me as a cheery sort of bloke But lately I’ve been the victim of the cruel banjo joke. They seem to pass aspersions to my musical ability And put me in a category of audible senility It started with the difference between a banjo picker and…. In various, friendly banter that takes place in my band. For example the difference,, and I know this sounds absurd Between a banjo and a macaw, one is loud and nauseous, the other is a bird. We can move this argument on to things of equal, improbability Such as, crossing roads with chickens, this can lack viability Because a player and a chicken might not seem so big But there is an outside chance the chicken’s going to a gig. Questions are also posed on actions you would nurse Such as driving over a banjo, then using the reverse Or wondering what would happen when dropped from on high, seems fair But then exclamating that no one would care?. Or defining a musical term like perfect pitch you chide; i.e. Tossing a banjo into a toilet without touching the side When people make comparisons, like a horse to a cart Some say a banjo is to music, as etch-er –sketch is to art But the most hurtful of remarks, that pierce this cheery soul Are those directed at me, or the people involved. Now some define us pickers as in league with the devil But it really does annoy me when they check the stage is level By monitoring the dribble from both sides of my grin I accept I should I should move on, like water from a ducks chin But he’s got a gig to go to, just like that bloody chicken. {Doesn’t Rhythm, but then I’m a new poet). Now we are always accommodating, and requests we’ll entertain BUT GEORGE FORNBY PLAYS THE UKELELE, I know nothing by that name I may be coming across angry; I wouldn’t want to make a stink But when you ask, “Do you know Duelling Banjo’s?” What do you “BLOODY” think? So ignorance is not limited to those who play the 5 string But there is one piece of banjo terminology whose knowledge I must bring There seems to be a miss understanding, a trend I must buck But come on ladies and gentlemen its Pheasants that we……..PLUCK Now I must bring this little ditty to its ultimate conclusion, And answer a question, so you’re under no illusion Why are there no banjos in Star Trek? I hear you shout Because it’s set in the future… Silly, that’s what its all about. Now it seems I’ve been disparaging to all us Banjo tax payers But lets us ALL thank God for giving us Bass players.
Posted on: Tue, 30 Dec 2014 12:17:35 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015