I asked my son if my relationship with Christ made him want to know God more? I asked the question because if I were to be honest, this kid has been so impacted by my carnal decisions and he is the best judge of my transformation. I am his mom and I have done some things in my life to injure him on my journey to being who God has intended. He is the one whom Ive taken my frustrations out on and when he makes the same mistakes Ive made in the past, I have pounced on him so hard that I made my beloved child afraid of me. This is the regret of my life. So if there is anyone that I know could give me a clear assessment, its him. I bought the bait of satan for a long time that image was everything. I pushed my child trying to make him be what I saw other peoples children doing til I almost pushed him out of his own life. My fears often made my lash out in ways that werent healthy for him. He has however seen me fight anyone who ever tried to harm my baby; family and all. He knows that I love him even when my style is not subtle. He knows Ive made mistakes but he also knows Im trying. So he gets to answer the question. Like Jesus we cannot ask the crowd who see us as powerful, strong, and amazing to assess us. We must ask the people closest to us, the ones most affected by us, the ones who are vulnerable to us. We must ask the ones who see us when the spotlight is off and the crowd is gone. We must ask them; does my walk make you want to follow Jesus? Are my actions leading you closer to Christ or are they repelling you? When you leave my house will you run to the House of God or will you run from anything that has to do with Him because of me? While Im grateful for the wonderful words of people who are impacted by what God has used me to do in ministry, I am tempered by the knowledge that I often fail the people who love me the most and yet they still love God. People are so deceived by their own hearts. But every now and then you have to check the people who love you the most to see how youre doing with. His Response: Yes mom, you make me want to know God more, I just hadnt counted on you casting out demons, and people manifesting all over the place. But Im very proud of you.Lol. Thats my boy!
Posted on: Wed, 03 Sep 2014 17:30:25 +0000
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