I began writing today the story of Suzi, which I have put off for far too long. I solicit prayers that I can capture in words her short walk to the gate where Jesus waited and how brave were her final days. This is the preface to the book, and the start of what I know will be a painful and difficult story to tell. A heartfelt thank you to all of you who have encouraged me to put her story to print. I will need to draw on that encouragement frequently as I progress. God bless. We stopped in Payson on our way back to Phoenix from our summer place in Heber. We were going to see her doctor again because the TPN, the nutrient feeding apparatus that was supplying her food through a port in her chest, didnt seem to be keeping up her strength as promised to us. I had gone into Jack-in-the-Box for a quick bite to eat before we headed on down the hill. As I came back to the car I saw she had unhooked the feeding tube from her chest. I looked into her eyes and she quietly said, Dont be angry. Tears immediately filled my own and I said, Im not. Then, I added, Are you sure? She simply nodded, yes. In the time it had taken for me to go into the restaurant and come back with my food, everything had changed. Suzi had reached her limit. Hope was gone. She was ready to see Jesus and I loved her enough that I would support her decision, though my heart wanted to beg her to keep trying. The nutrients were not helping and she could not even digest water so she was living in a constant state of hunger and weakness. Without the little nourishment she was getting from the formula, she would now literally starve to death. My job, from that moment on, was to see her to the Gate where Jesus waited and to be with her every step of the way. This book is my attempt to honor her memory by telling her story. It is my hope that a husband or wife who reads it will see it for what it is; a glimpse of the road ahead and a way to navigate that painful and difficult path when the vow to love and cherish in sickness and health takes on a desperate and tragic meaning.
Posted on: Wed, 01 Oct 2014 20:17:24 +0000
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