I failed to mention that on my second flight a Woman passed out 5 times in the aisle on her way to the bathroom. The 5th time that she collapsed was RIGHT next to my seat. I had to be coaxed and convinced to fly in the first place. Id rather drive 3,300 miles than fly. Why? Because nothing NORMAL ever happens to me thats why! The Airplane Stewards did the whole Is there a Doctor on Board? or when no one responded Is there a medical professional?. The Med-Link System that was ALSO right next to me was DEAD. And after a few minutes a reluctant Doctor decided to help. So Ive got 3 panicky stewardesses, a pale unconscious Woman, a busted Med-Link System, a tipsy guy whose Birthday it is in the other aisle, a Reluctant & Shitty doctor, and a man trapped in the Bathroom by the unconscious womans legs! Like I said this is my NORMAL. But... As Grace would have it one seat in between me and this scenario was Norm. Norm! A seasoned airline pilot of 20 years who had accumulated 25,000 hrs of Flight Time! He talked me through the whole experience!!! Yeah she could die of cardiac arrest or just be having an anxiety attack is something he said. Or we may have to divert the flight to Toronto to get her to a hospital. Or she could die. Wow! Calm, simple, and normal. Norm. They never got Med-Link online. The Lady didnt die. She got the Birthday Boys seat. Norm with whiskey on his breath distracted me for the rest of the flight with stories about flying Lady Gaga, Kevin Spacey, Vin Diesel, Julia Roberts, and JLo. I got a refresher course on cloud formations, weather patterns, and airplane performance. Xan slept thru the WHOLE thing! My Life is a Mother Goose Story. Nothin Normal except for Norm.
Posted on: Sun, 03 Nov 2013 20:16:53 +0000
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