I had a job working as a bank teller Every day from nine a.m. to five I wore a tie, a jacket, and a smile Always last to leave and first to arrive But the bank, it started losing of money There was panic and whispering in the halls Then they said that Im to blame For I played this little game As I counted out my customers withdrawals: Lets see, thats... One for them and one for me One for them and one for me One for them then another one for me One goes out and one stays in Ones a loss and ones a win More for them, well that just means more for me One for them and one for me One for them and one for me A good one for them, but a better one for me One for them and one for me One for them and one for me One for them and one more for old Number One, see They fired me for that. Well, Ill never step foot in that place again And you can take that to the bank Moving on! I spent a summer working as an orderly At a mental institution by the lake The patients were impatient and disorderly Their brains had taken more than they could take I treated them with kindness and compassion I took them out for walks among the hills The job was going great Til one day the nurse was late And they asked me, Could you please pass out the pills? And I said... One for them and one for me One for them and one for me One for you and, Oh, don’t mind if I do! One for them and one for me A red for them, a red for me A blue for them, a blue for You Know Who One goes out and one stays near One for there and one for here One for you and you, so two for me Three for them and three for me Four for them and four for me Five for them and five for me Six for them and six for me Seven for them and seven for me Eight for them and eight for me Nine... nine pills... nine pills Look at my hands... theyre going crazy... Where was I? Seriously, I dont know where I was. Wherever it was, Im sure Im not allowed back. Moving on! All the food in my home has been eaten Theres broken toys and diapers everywhere The halls are full of little muddy footprints And a full second of silence is rare Little hands, they root through my belongings My home is the site of a full invasion, see The place is crawling with babies Cause a friend suggested, Maybe You could work at that adoption agency. And its been... One for them and one for me One for them and one for me One for them that I end up liking, so I keep it One for them and one for me A he for them, a he for me A she for them, another she for me One for them, one for me An inch for them, an inch for me I give 2000 pounds, I keep a ton One for them and one for me One for them then one for me Then two for them, cause remember I owe them one. Life is all about balance, kids! No, dont balance on that! Now put that down...
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 02:52:17 +0000
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