I had gotten some space saver bags...so I went through Alaynas - TopicsExpress

I had gotten some space saver bags...so I went through Alaynas clothes/blankets again to put them in the bags. I swear..that will never get easier. Holding a piece of clothing she used to wear all the time and knowing she wont be here to wear it again...remembering how small she really was...just all the memories flashing by. This is literally the hardest thing I have ever went through. Every single day..I sit here wishing that I had her back. That CHD didnt win. Thinking about everything she went through and wishing she didnt have to be so strong and fight so hard. It all just sucks. I just cant believe this is my life. I am a mother who lost her first child. Her baby girl. *sigh* I love you Alayna. Miss you so so much.

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