I had the great privilege of delivering the eulogy today at Paul Goochs Memorial Service. It was one of the most difficult things Ive ever done. I hope you dont mind if I share my comments with you. I will forever cherish my time with Paul. He drove me nuts, but I loved him so much!! Meghan, Connie, Ruth, Lois, and Mark, and friends of the Paul Gooch family, I promise to be brief. I was about to say, “Excluding my family, Paul was one of my two best friends in the world.” But that would not be entirely accurate, because Paul was family. He was my brother. We met 40 years ago on the first day of our Junior year in High School in 1974, and immediately became great friends. We went through all the High School rituals together, drama and trauma – first girlfriends, first girl friend break ups, parties, the drive-in movies; all of it. Paul was simply part of the family and he was on the receiving end of my Mom’s wrath on more than one occasion. And that was how he knew she loved him so much. He always called her, Mom, and Meghan still refers to her as Grandma Robillard. I’m sure she always will. Our lives took very different paths, but we always managed to stay close. Brothers do that. Paul really loved being at the cabin with us up in Oconto County on the Oconto River and in 1984, he started deer hunting with us. Deer hunting stories are legendary, and in our camp, usually include Paul in some way, shape or form. Every time we thought Paul had screwed up in every conceivable manner, he found another way. You have to be a member of a long-standing deer camp to really appreciate the special bond that exists among camp mates. Paul shared so many great times with great friends. Many are here today, but many more could not make it, and have asked me to convey their heartfelt condolences to Meghan and his family. We could all tell stories that would have us laughing for the next 3 hours, but I decided it might be best to save the stories for the next times when we’re gathered as friends and family. I can assure you stories will be told with great gusto in the Robillard deer camp this November, though it will certainly be different this year. It will be different forever. I should also say that Paul shared many serious moments with his friends as well. We spoke of faith and family, current events, and matters of war and peace. Paul could be a very serious, deep thinker – but he was very good at hiding that fact. Just an example – I used to really enjoy playing chess and was not too bad at one point in time. But in the hundred or so times Paul and I played, I never beat him once. Literally not once! I drove me nuts! In fact, no one on the planet could drive me nuts more quickly than Paul. I often joked that we were close friends because we shared a common political philosophy – no that wasn’t it. Actually, we were close because we both shared a love of the Green Bay Packers – no that wasn’t it. Perhaps we were close because we shared professional ambitions? No……… Actually, we were close for one reason, and one reason only – we loved one another. Actually, there were many times when we really didn’t like each other all that much – but we always loved one another. I don’t claim to understand why things happen, but I always try to find a path to acceptance. I’ve always tried to live by a credo – In the long run, things always work out for the best, just as they’re supposed to – but it’s never the way we thought they would or should. We did not create the plan and do not have the power to change the plan. Sometimes, the only thing we can control is the attitude with which we choose to respond to the events in our lives. Therefore; I choose to be thankful for every moment we had together. That we hugged each other when we came together and hugged when we parted. And that we each told each other how much we loved one another. I choose to thank The Lord for blessing Paul and Connie with a wonderful daughter, and the blessing of watching her grow to be a beautiful young woman. Meghan – he loved you more than you can possibly know. I choose to be thankful that Meghan had more than 22 years with a father she loved so deeply. I also choose to grieve now – we have suffered a loss and it is only normal to grieve that loss. I know that, in time, Jesus will grant us the comfort we seek. The thoughts that now bring tears, will soon bring smiles. Memories that are now painful, will soon be comforting. That’s how this grieving process works. We trust that God doesn’t give us a burden we can’t bear, if we will only have Faith. I wondered yesterday what Paul would have said if he could have sent one last message. Would he tell us he secretly loved the Green Bay Packers? Would he tell us he was going to remain clean shaven with short hair the rest of his life or that he was a closet Tea Party Member? Nope, nope, and most definitely, NOPE! I think he would have sent one last message to Meghan, quoting Winnie the Pooh: “If ever there is a tomorrow when we’re not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we are apart, I will always be with you.” That, and, “I love you, Meghan. And I love you all.”
Posted on: Sun, 06 Jul 2014 03:42:11 +0000
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