I have a confession to make. Recently as shallow as this sounds... I have been struggling with my self image because I chopped off my hair. I preach self appreciation and inner natural beauty. Yet I felt I lost myself in the locks cut away. I almost felt like a piece of security was gone. I knew that my hair was something I was very sure about. It was represented as an anchor of my identity. I didnt realize how vulnerable I felt after it was gone. I should have felt liberated but instead I felt alone... I felt unsure... I felt insecure... Not just physically but internally. I became angry and bitter about how I felt. I am the biggest hypocrite right now... Even more angry that no matter the compliments... No matter the attention or affection I received from my husband. I couldnt stand looking into the mirror... I didnt feel myself. For someone who has been so sure.. I second guessed it. I felt shallow... It became mentally exhausting just trying to fight my feelings with logic. Its just hair. It will grow back. It wasnt that its hair... It was meant to empower me. And it wasnt. I am now starting to appreciate it for what it is. And admitting this to you is hard for me... But I know Im not the only one who may go through something like this from time to time. I felt maybe if I shared I wouldnt feel as alone. And maybe as a human being I can be allowed to feel insecure and be okay. I saw this video and been sharing similar love yourself music videos and I feel like its a sign. You are beautiful. That is all.
Posted on: Mon, 14 Jul 2014 20:30:34 +0000
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