I have bipolar disorder. air the dirty laundry of how terrible of a person I am. the fact is I dont hide behind my disorder, if I break down and cry I dont say oh its bc Im bipolar, I apologize and say Im a little too emotional and laugh it off, lets just push it under the rug. when I get angry and tell and say stupid things I dont stop in the middle of a fight and go oh Im bipolar by the way so I cant control this. I generally apologize for the stupidity of my actions and say that I realize I was acting rediculous, lets just turn a blind eye to it. but I will tell you during the incident non of my thoughts make sense they race thru my head like a speeding bullet and generally make no sense at all as I speak them and when you say I dont even understand wat u are saying or your not making sense I usually dont know either. at that moment in time there is absolutely no control its a full blast and Im not even in control. I want someone out there that would actually go somewhere and find out about my disorder instead of denying the problem. maybe some that claim so much love in their hearts for me to think maybe I should learn about this bc me having a bipolar disorder does not in anyway define your parenting skills or your relationship skills with me. it is a disorder. look it up and take time out of your day to read up on it and maybe then you will hear the silence of my cries in my eyes, and understand why I do choose to keep to myself and dont say much to you in general bc its so much easier then pretending that Im ok. #toairingmyowndirtylittlesecrets.
Posted on: Tue, 22 Oct 2013 23:08:54 +0000
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