I have moments, even days, when all I want is to be a normal mom. Days that dont revolve around sitting at the hospital and waiting. Waiting, always waiting. Waiting on my turn to just be a mom, waiting to post normal pictures having fun outside with Carson, bouncing him on my knee, even just being able to pick him up and hold him without a huge ordeal and alarms and sticky tape pulling at him. Things most people wouldnt even think twice about. Normal, is such a broad word. I hate that this is our normal, but on days like these when Im angry and my heart hurts and I just want to scream out of frustration, I try to remember that Ive already witnessed a miracle. Carson being alive right now, in this moment, is a miracle on its own. He will never remember any of this and this, too, is his normal; its all he knows. Praying for strength today as I am feeling very weak and vulnerable. This too shall pass. 2 Corinthians 4: 17-18 “For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever. So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.”
Posted on: Mon, 22 Sep 2014 14:42:08 +0000
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