I have the privilege and otherwise great good fortune to be able to kick a lover to the curb if said lover seriously upsets me (never mind beats me). I have never relied on a partner financially or for basic needs such as food, shelter, clean water, or clothing. I have never had anyone question my choices regarding whether I stayed or left. If you dont understand why I find it gauche that people are blaming Ray Rices wife, look at what I have that maybe she didnt always. Look at and think about the cycle of abuse: theyre not all nasty all the time. Sometimes they apologize and you want to redeem them and then it happens again, and thats how the cycle happens. That is Fifty Shades territory, in case youve never given it a second thought -- I know there are people who, rightfully, give no shits about that trilogy. :) I am not blaming a woman for whom all of this may have come during a good time in the cycle. My God, the brainwashing effect an abuser has on a victim, they can leave and then go back ad nauseam before they see -- and they have to be able to see it; its not just before some well-meaning person tells them theyre being hurt. She needs the safe space from the rest of us to be able to process, and we need to try and understand what shes saying and be mindful of all the possible whys.
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 23:33:11 +0000
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