“I have this huge crush on my professor. What should I do?” Hey guys! I’m a sophomore student from AB and here’s my confession I know it’s really weird and perhaps cringey, pero I think I’m falling in love with my former professor. Okay medyo exaggerated na ata yung ‘falling in love’ haha let’s just say na I have this huge crush on him. Alam kong bawal talaga but I just couldn’t help it. 7 years ang age gap namin so I guess hindi naman ganon ka-layo (kasi ganyan din ang age gap ng parents ko). He’s 24 and I’m 17. I’ve been trying to sort out my feelings for him kasi baka fleeting emotion lang ‘to. Sadly, it’s getting even worse each day. So here’s my story: (please take time to read this, it would mean a lot!) During our first year (second semester), a new professor for our major subject was introduced to us. Even before he came to our class, naririnig na namin from the higher batch na gwapo daw yung professor na ‘to and bata pa. To cut it short, almost every girl in our block had a crush on him…except for me. As in wala talaga siyang dating sakin. I mean he’s cute and all, pero hindi umabot sa point na nagka-crush ako sakanya. I couldn’t relate everytime na kinikilig sila whenever he’s around. Naaalala ko pa nga one time, I told some of my friends na never talaga ako magkaka-crush sakanya. Haha I guess I ate my own words. Second year came (first semester to be exact). A few days after the first day of classes, one of my blockmates announced to the entire block that this professor of ours will be our professor again for that semester. I don’t know what got into me but I felt sorta giddy about it. Weeks have passed and our class president told us that we will be having our class picture taken on July 5. Fresh na fresh parin sa mind ko yung nangyari that day. While waiting for the photographer, my friends and I decided to take selfies (and groupies) with our professor – since he was also our adviser. Unfortunately, the photographer didn’t show up so sayang lang yung paghintay namin sa may bandang lover’s lane. Pero on second thought, I wouldn’t say na it was sayang because if it wasn’t for that moment, hindi ako magkakaron ng photos with him. From that day on, nagkaka crush na pala ako sakanya and I wasn’t even aware of it! (lol I didn’t even know that was possible). Anyways, since then, I started stalking him on facebook and saved some of his photos in my documents; and it somehow became my daily routine lalo na kung wala namang kailangan na gawin for school the next day (creepy ba? Huhu I’m so sorryyy) I’ve liked him for almost 6 months now. My friends keep telling me to stop na kasi wala naman talagang chance and I’ll just end up getting hurt. As much as I want to stop, hindi ko talaga kaya. Do you guys want to know why I like him so much? Well apart from his baby face, super witty pa niya. I’m a sucker for guys who have a good sense of humor. Tapos sobrang smart pa and very articulate. Na-mention ko naman kanina na twice namin siya naging professor (and adviser). So yeah, everytime na tapos na siya magdiscuss in front, he would always find time to interrogate us kung kumusta na kami and if we have concerns with regards to our academics. Basta ang caring talaga niya. Sobrang bait and approachable; we couldn’t ask for more. Then even though I’m having a rough day, makita ko lang siya nawawala na agad yung bad vibes. It’s like nothing or no one could ruin my day anymore kasi I’ll just end up daydreaming the whole day (which I constantly do during my leisure time). Totoo nga talaga na there’s always that one person who could make you smile even when things aren’t going so well, and even when he’s doing nothing at all. I know it’s a bit cheesy but every time I see him smile, napapa-smile narin ako and I’m feeling all kilig inside. Pero to be honest, I’m actually confused right now because I seriously don’t know if he’s making me happier or sadder. Last month kasi I found out that he will be going abroad na next year, tapos nalaman ko rin na he won’t be our professor for this coming semester anymore. Na-depress talaga ako that day (it was a few days after sembreak began). I may sound silly for saying this, but I actually cried when I heard the news. Second semester started and I could really feel that something’s missing. To think na hindi na siya papasok sa room namin. Hanggang ngayon hindi parin talaga ako masyado sanay but I know that eventually, I’ll get used to it. I just really miss him. Lately nakaka-salubong ko siya sa building pero I couldn’t even say “hi” to him nang hindi nagpapanic. I think I’m acting this way kasi nafifeel ko na he already knows that I like him (thanks to my blockmates! Huhu). Right now, siya lang talaga yung inspiration and motivation ko to do well in school. Just by seeing him makes me feel so happy. Sometimes I even imagine na what if one day, he would randomly walk up to me and initiate a conversation or something. Oh who am I kidding haha even my blockmates think that I’ve already lost my sanity! I have been living in this fantasy world of mine for quite some time now, but I couldn’t care any less because he’s the only person who’s giving me joy at the moment. So there, I know it’s wrong. Pero I really really like him. You might be wondering what made me post here on Ust files. Well, it’s because he liked this page lol but I don’t think he’ll be reading this (kasi super haba and I don’t even know kung babasahin rin ‘to ng iba.. oh well), pero thank you to those who read my story though (or should I say confession)! God bless everyone! Have a happy and productive semester! :-) Student-zoned FACULTY OF ARTS AND LETTERS
Posted on: Sun, 01 Dec 2013 10:12:35 +0000
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