I know, I know, long overdue for an update, but it is so hard not having much to report. I so long to be able to share new exciting news, but unfortunately not much has changed on the Visagie front. I have so been trying to find the appropriate word to sum up the emotion we are feeling at the moment and due to the fact that it is such a deep, wide and extreme emotion it feels like it should be accompanied by some impressive, “hard to pronounce” word, but the only word that comes close to describing it is the little word “sad”. We are all simply sad, and it is an emotion that has the viscosity of flowing liquid as it seems to seep into every area of our lives, permeating every fibre of our being. It takes all our energy to just try and function as “normal” on a day to day basis, and to try rebuild some sort of life and future coming out of this terrible unthinkable tragedy. Some days it even feels impossible. But we have survived over twenty months and all we have to continue doing is placing one foot in front of the other, lean on each other and press into the love we share as a family. And remember that with God HOPE is our anchor and our life line, hope in Him and hope in His plans. I too think we are in the phase of “acceptance” and this phase is like a very bitter pill of poison to swallow let alone digest. It brings with it the knowledge that things have changed forever and won’t be going back to how they were before. Accepting. It’s hard. It’s almost more devastating than the original shock of the bad news we received, because it means our circumstances are here to stay. Firstly we miss the joy Ryley brought into our lives, his quirkiness has left a huge void never to be replaced by anything else. His uniqueness has become so evident in his absence and it brings a deep sadness as we reflect daily on his loss and the “missing” doesn’t get easier. Then, we still face Cal’s struggle; with 24 gruelling hours in each day. His beautiful smile and infectious laugh so missed by us all. We would do anything to have our beautiful precious child restored to us. But having said all of the above and sounding so very down and depressed, let me importantly add that we are still the recipients of some of the most amazing blessing and have true, valued and very loving people around who continue to support us and love us through this valley and for this we simply Praise Jesus. Cal has gone through some very rough patches this winter with his chest acting up, then clearing up just to rear its ugly head again. But as the season changes and the warmth seeps back we can celebrate that we have made it through. Still a tad chesty, but definitely not ill, Cal pushes on. His days vary, with some good, some bad and the reason for either unknown to us. He continues with daily therapy and is still under the loving care of Ricky and John. He is eating well, now accepting some savoury foods as part of his daily menu and really handling rougher textures quite well too. He makes a good few sounds and we love hearing his voice. Some days he is more alert and responsive to commands, other days he isn’t; we have learned to go with “his” flow. The days we appreciate most are the ones where he is less spasmed and more relaxed as one can clearly see how the spasms distress him. We have purchased a new bed for Cal, and this has so added to the quality of his days as we can see how much more comfortable he is. We used funds from his Trust Fund for this and so on that note I would like to thank everyone who so generously donated into his account. It felt so good using the blessings we had been given for such a worthy acquisition and we know that each one of you would be so overjoyed to know that it has added such value to Cal’s life at this point. He spends a lot of time in his bed, and it was always evident that he was stiff and not too comfortable. The bed still allows us four hour intervals at night without pressure sores being an issue and Cal looks so incredibly comfortable it is a very special picture to see. So a big thank you!! We so wish we had known about this bed before and although it came at a considerable price it has been worth every cent. Thanks go to Amanda who continues to think of us at every turn and found out about the bed and its benefits and thought it would help Cal, which it has. To all the special people who continue to visit, love and pray us through this impossibly difficult time again we give our hearts in gratitude, not sure where we would be without you as this journey is impossible to do without the blessings of love we have received. Spiritually we have been carried by such committed brother and sisters in Christ and for this we are most grateful as this tragedy has tested our faith on every side and your encouragements, scriptures and prayers have literally kept us upright. We are devastated but very blessed, shattered but very supported and again we say thank you. Just a very special thank you to Oliver and Bernel, strangers before this, but wow you guys have reached out to us so incredibly, and it has been one of the most humbling experiences to be on the receiving end of your love, thank you. We so long for a day when Cal can extend his own thanks to you. Now we know why Ryley felt so welcome in your home and why he loved your son as a friend, you are people with the biggest hearts and we are grateful we have come to know you. Thanks again. On that note I end this update, hoping that the next will bring positive news. We continue to remember Rom 8;28 “And we know that in ALL THINGS God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose”. We rest in His purpose, trusting His ways and His timing completely and knowing we serve a Great God who remains in control of EVERYTHING.
Posted on: Wed, 17 Sep 2014 18:03:56 +0000
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