I know this is a bit of a personal share, but Im experiencing feelings, guess Im looking for support if one can. If not, its cool. Just got this in my inbox, its indicating why Im no longer allowed to see my niece. I must process this, and move on. I wrote a really diplomatic response back, pointing out some things w/o making myself sound/look bad, so I feel ok about that, though Im still left shaken, with the feelings. Because Im a highly sensitive person, I actually sensed this long time, and regret not taking control of the situation by emailing her first, diplomatically, so as to spare me the pain. No mention of names here, of course, and this person is now gone/deleted off my FB as it shouldve been long ago (btw, I starred the part of it that i dont think are very *respectful* as she put it): Hey I just wanted to say I am sorry you have had such a bad experience with psychiatry and your blogs etc are well written but I respectfully disagree with many of your views. Your personal experiences are *yours and yours alone* but what I find troubling and I think *a lot of people* reading your articles may similarly have is you brush everything with the same broad strokes as your personal opinions/experiences. Psychiatry is currently helping your niece immensely and has helped many of our previous foster children and close friends. Again I am sorry your experience has been so traumatic but the Mental Health system although flawed is helping ____ and I therefore cannot share, like or continue to read. I hope you can understand, and I hope *once you come to some sort of peace with all of this you and your family can spend some time with ___.* Respectfully _____ Well first of all, I put a whole take what you like and leave the rest kind of disclaimer on my site. Secondly: A) Yours and yours alone: I dont think so, many people (autistics especially) have experienced similar to what I have. They have told me so. There is evidence, some horror stories. B) A lot of people: No, some people, mainly neurotypicals (such as herself) who do not live in poverty and thus have had better, more quality experiences. I may sometimes sound intense in *how* I say things, and I may miss parts of the picture whilst I didnt know about that aspect; but ultimately my experiences are real, and so are others. *Importantly, I pointed out to her that the quality of service level does differ between her foster children/her middle upper class circle, and mine. Though were not in the USA, we still have a silent, more passive aggressive, in fact structurally violent hierarchy going on in this healthcare system. Its worse in a way because theres no admittance of it! However, foster kids are given the cream of the crop, in order to make the system look good. Whats disgusting is, if these kids parents were helped more, these kids wouldnt end up in the system in the first place. My nieces my mother (my sister) is schizoaffective because she never got help for her autism and severe NLD, which should have been intervened long ago. Now shes pretty well beyond it, and though I know she really isnt fit (sadly in her case, its true) this wouldnt have happened if shes been helped far sooner. How dare this woman tell me that my experiences are mine alone whilst housing tons of kids whose parents the system badly failed. breaking apart their families. Like, really? Sorry, just heated right now. C) Once you come to some sort of peace with all of this, you and your family can spend some time with ___.* Thats a very passive-agressive way of saying change who you are and your beliefs or you cant see your niece. (oh I cannot *stand* passive aggression..and they call *us* manipulative?) Look, I love my niece very much, and always will, but sorry, I dont accept those kind of ultimatums. I have no control over the way this woman chooses to filter this child for in which shes a guardian, but Im left with not being able to change myself just to suit her, either. Its a painful paradox. Not to mention, Im not comfortable with someone viewing me through this kind of lens, being on my personal FB, able to observe my life and struggles, when they dont understand the exact nature of how this manifests with my autism. Anyways, I do need a break from the writing soon, and it can get intense, but Im here to actualize what I went through, that Im *not* the only one, and for those people whom it helps. I admit I need to work on healing, and Im trying. I will do more of it come fall, when its art time. However, my experiences are real, and I am entitled to my beliefs. No more words now. I go and process, and divert too. Autisms Own conference tomorrow. among community. Focus on that.
Posted on: Sun, 24 Aug 2014 07:47:46 +0000
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