I love my pets. Owning animals is a truly magical experience. Just this morning, for example, I came downstairs to find delightful poo smearage all over the living room floor. It seems pushing through the curtain to the garden outside was all too much for one of the dogs, so he decided to crimp one off right there in front of the OPEN door. Not only that, another (or possibly the same – the jurys still out) canine offender had decided to embellish the steaming poo with a lovely long luxurious piss, making sure to go all up the curtain and all over the dehumidifier, too. On closer inspection, I noticed this shit-and-piss mess was dotted with bird feathers and bloody streaks. Because one of the cats (I suspect Susan, its always her) had decided it would be super fun to tear apart a dove in the middle of the shit-and-piss installation. So now Im looking for a half-dead shit-and-piss covered bird. The trail of feathers and muck led me to the kitchen, where I found the dove, half bald but only stunned, sitting in the sink. I threw a sarong over it to catch it, but the sarong caught on some cutlery in the drainer, and pulled the whole thing off the draining board, smashing cups and bowls and dispersing the fragments to the four corners of the kitchen. I took the dove outside and put it in the magnolia tree and sat down to have a ciggie in the garden. Pets. Theyre wonderful. I cant imagine life without them. Does anybody want mine? ADOPT NOW!
Posted on: Thu, 20 Nov 2014 08:03:50 +0000
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