I miss James. Its day 3. I feel sad I wont lie. I dont want to act chipper because I dont feel it. I dont want to pretend I am bubbly because I am not right now. I think its ok to be sad when you feel sad. I use to think if I was sad I was supposed to try everything to get happy as soon as possible. I have embraced it after so many years of dealing with it. I dont stay sad for long, but when I am sad I feel it deeply. I allow myself to feel every bit of it. I talk to God. I write in my journal. I play sad songs on my guitar. I dont do my hair everyday. I usually wear sweat pants. You know the look, especially if you shop at Walmart. Today I wish I had at least put a hat on. A mans truck broke down today and everyone was going around him as he tried to push his truck up a hill. It was by the bridge so it was causing quite a traffic jam. I went around finally and parked up the hill and ran down to help. My hair a mess. Looking very homely with my sweats, T shirt, and oversized big coat. I ran behind and pushed on the back of the dirty truck as the driver pushed from the driver side guiding the wheel. Rubie was with me and she helped too. We got the truck up the hill and around the corner so the other cars could pass. He thanked us as we dusted our hands and walked toward our car. Rubie looked at me and said I like doing that kind of stuff with you mom she smiled and then I smiled too. I looked in the rear view mirror real quick to see if I really looked as bad as I felt. I started laughing because I forgot I had white pasty zit cream on my forehead, right between my eyes. I laughed because for a moment I felt like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day and I just didnt care at all or I did care, but not like I usually do. I chuckled a few more times on the way home at myself. After all I love a good laugh and those that know me know how goofy I can be. I guess I wont be sad for too long. Especially if I keep going out in public with zit cream on my face and bad hair. Sorry I dont have a picture for yall. I do have SOME dignity left. Lol! Youll have to use your imagination. It shouldnt be too hard. Hope this made yA laugh.
Posted on: Thu, 15 Jan 2015 02:44:09 +0000
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