I recently read an article claiming mothers who work outside the home are more stressed at home than at work I agree. Like Greeley Moms on Facebook today! While my job can be demanding at times, I am definitely more stressed when it comes to getting things done around the house. I spend a lot of time during the workweek figuring out the responsibilities that need to be taken care of on the weekend and making a plan. Those plans always fall through. Because, once the weekend arrives, I’d much rather take Ella swimming or to a petting zoo. I rationalize putting the must-dos on hold for the want-tos since household chores will always be there but her wobbly little run and amazement at all things simple will not. However, when Sunday night arrives, I inevitably have an anxiety attack looking at the dirty dishes and un-mopped floor along with many other tasks left undone in the wake of our fun activities. I never realized the shortage of hours in Saturday and Sunday until it came to fitting in household chores and playtime. I always have the best intentions to spend time each weeknight getting something done so there is less to do on the weekends, but alas, I underestimate the mentally taxing power of a career plus a child - specifically, a very active and curious toddler. So how do I do it all? I don’t; but I have come up with some strategies to help me gain some control. Use your village. If you are fortunate it enough to have a spouse and/or friends and family nearby, admit defeat and ask them for help. Through many tears and anxiety attacks, I have learned this hard lesson. I have tried the Superwoman gig and I don’t want it. No one else expects me to be perfect, why should I expect that of myself? It takes a village of all kinds to help and, most of the time, the villagers are ready and willing to lend a hand. Or, sometimes, admitting defeat might mean hiring someone to come clean your house for that extra peace of mind and that’s okay too. Write things down. Do not add the task of remembering things on to your to-do list. Write it down. Get the thoughts out of your head. See it on paper. I am always amazed at the physical and mental relief I feel after writing down the list of tasks that run through my head. I am a visual learner and seeing a list helps me to see the bigger picture, organize my priorities, and set a timeline. (It also helps that my husband is very good at talking it through with me). Plus, crossing something off the list is a small victory and can make it easy to tackle the next, sometimes tougher, priority. Try the three-minute rule. I once read that if you do anything for three minutes, or the length of an average song, you will 1) be invested enough to finish the task and 2) continue to be motivated to move on to another task after you’re finished. I initially thought this was a little absurd but it really works. Any time, at work or home, that I feel myself dreading a task, I just say to myself “do it for three minutes” and, before I know it, I’m finishing that chore and moving on to another one. Explore employer flexibility. Don’t be afraid to ask about flexible work schedules. I am lucky enough to have a supervisor who values family time and understands the demands of working while having a family. When I started my new job, I was able to arrange my hours to start early and leave early so I can spend extra time in the afternoons with my daughter. Individual companies, along with our state and federal governments, are all moving toward a culture of policies more suited for working parents. The United States is seriously lagging behind other countries when it comes to benefits for working parents, yet family focus is finally in the forefront of the minds of lawmakers and CEOs alike. Take advantage. Research your company’s policies and ask your supervisor for options. Let It Go. No, I’m not going to break into a work-themed rendition of the Frozen hit. What I mean is, give yourself a break. You are only one person and can only do so much. When it comes down to it, spend time with your kids and let the guilt go. Our kids are not going to remember the piles of laundry or the dirty floor. What they will remember are trips to the zoo and walks to the park. Remember, they really do grow up fast.
Posted on: Mon, 30 Jun 2014 09:41:28 +0000
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