I see after reading todays devotion why it takes a strong person to be my friend .... Sometimes the pressure of unspoken grief is like that inside a pressure Cooker - it builds and builds until one feels as tho another tiny increment of pain will drive you mad . Speak .... Tell a friend . Tell another ( if there is one ) ... Or tell the same again . A wise friend will know one must tell this tale again and again . One way to begin - particularly if death has been unexpected and hard to believe - is recount to this understanding friends in as much detail as you can remember the events of that day . This kind of retelling of the day grounds the event in the real world and helps us begin to believe the terrible truth of that day . What happened is not a fantasy or something we can put in a bubble and hold away from the rest of our life . It took place in real time on a real day and as terribly sad to recount it helps release the pressure inside and activate the flow of healing - friend to friend ......... As far as myself goes I can tell you this is true . I think I have called this feeling anxiety when its actually pressure . Its not often I talk to anyone about that day . Still feels unreal . When I see Vince upset or like tonight as we went to the cemetery to look at the solar lights , I know in my heart how sad I must really be , but I know in my mind I have to be strong . I know tomorrow will come and when I wake nothing will be different than today was ... But it is so different than July 28th .... And most everyone elses lives go on as usual . Realty of death seems so far away , that most friends cant relate ... Slowly everyone goes back to the way it life was ... While our days go by slower and heavier than ever before . It takes strong friends to carry on a simple conversation with us , or even read a post we post . At times up in Thomasville away from my own friends and family ,I think without having Facebook to express myself during this time my pressure cooker would have exploded . I can honestly say ... Not many people want to be part of this long often depressing part of our lives as it would disrupt theirs , but I thank God for the ones God has put in our lives , mine , Vinces and my kids , that have took on the difficult task of being our friends .
Posted on: Sun, 31 Aug 2014 03:16:01 +0000
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