I think in this new uber-heightened awareness of our surroundings during airline travel, the common courtesy that we once possessed as a society has eluded us. I recently was on a US Airways flight from Phoenix to STL and although rarely do we expect air travel to be punctual, as a traveler, I would sit least expect an explanation when we approach the Tarmac 30 minutes late. I am quite sure that all airline personnel want to do their jobs with the highest level of efficiently – not to mention getting home to their families and friends as well – but a simple story no matter how strayed from the truth it is, would be appreciated. Here are some other observations of my flight tonight…… 1. The travelers that insist on bringing a “hot dish” on board with them – you certainly don’t bring enough for everyone on board to share, but we will all leave with the aroma to linger on our clothes and hair, in our nostrils and ever gently turning our stomachs for the duration of the flight and perhaps until we can either breathe the faint whiff of a freshly polluted parking garage with the tantalizing smell of gas and oil, or our own puke. No matter whether it is pizza, Chinese egg rolls, burgers and fries or a bucket from the Colonel – it all stinks. I wouldn’t be surprised to see a battery powered George Foreman grill cooking paninis or zucchini halves at some point. Next time you fly, perhaps you would consider eating at home, in you car, or God forbid one of the many fine eating establishments that dot the airport terminal landscape. 2. There are other travelers who insist on chattering non-stop from the time their posterior hits the seat until the unfasten seat belt light goes off at the arriving gate. Do they not know that the only thing that travels faster and louder than the plane is the sound of their voices? They can be heard for rows and rows and rows and rows. 3. I have also noticed that at every gate that the airlines quite efficiently and clearly instruct passengers on the size of their “two carry-on” bags. Why then do these inconsiderate travelers insist on bringing onto the plane over-sized, over-stuffed and over-the-limit number of bags. Women who bring small duffle bags as purses and business travelers who refuse to check any bags for fear of – heavens to Betsy – having to wait for that darn carousel. They struggle and struggle to first get them down the ever shrinking aisle only to have to be in a weight lifting competition to lift them over their heads and finally to shove them in the overhead compartments, yeah – like they don’t weight more than 50 pounds. Oh, by the way – watch out for those passengers who are seated underneath your incoming air strike – one could get a conclusion from the severe blow your guided missile has for my head. 4. As mentioned previously, the aisles are shrinking in size, but certainly not our bodies. When you careen down the aisle, try not to resemble the ball in a pinball machine. No one really wants to rack up any points for you. Your duffel bag purse, overflowing backpack, diaper bag, kid-in-tow, coat, blanket, pillow and pet carrier do not score you points with me when you slam them into my head. 5. Finally, although you my fellow traveler, may have all the time in the world, there are others on your flight who just want to get from point A to point B, so would you kindly move it along? When boarding, people move at the pace of snails. They stop to do what appears to be window shop for where their seat is and what articles are deemed critical for their three-hour cruise. Heck, The Skipper and Gilligan didn’t take as much cargo as these people seem to need in their 2 x 1.5 foot holding area. On the other hand, the plane hits the gate and upon arrival, you would think that the Kentucky Derby moved to the interior of the fuselage. People rush to unbuckle, gather their belongings, and then STAND – in the aisle and in the seats with most times crashing their heads in the overhead compartment bottoms – is that where the phrase bottoms up came from? They scurry with such a frenzied pace that you would think the last orange ceramic ashtray is going on sale at Kmart. It never ceases to amaze me that they stand and poise themselves for what seems to be the opening of the gates at the Derby, but alas, they wait and wait and wait. They are not going anywhere at the moment but they stand nonetheless. There is no courtesy either when exiting. I think they should use the Minnesota Department of Highway’s “zipper”protocol – or better known as the “U-Go, I-Go” system. I think we would all get off the stinkin’ plane a lot faster if there was a disciplined and structured method. Maybe this is a project that the government should tackle; after all, they don’t seem to be doing anything of any major importance of late. I could go on for another hour and a half, but right now the flight attendant or steward - “Stewart” just brought me some highly caffeinated coffee that should keep me calm for the rest of the flight. My cup no matter how aggravating the situation, is always half-full. Thank you US Airways for another safe journey home to my family and friends and yes, I will travel with you once again, but please hold the smells and excess baggage to a minimum.
Posted on: Fri, 17 Oct 2014 16:28:50 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015