I think we may call this rant Tuesday - must be in the air this week! Sometimes we just need a safe place to air our frustrations - Heres another BonusMom needing to vent her frustrations over BM - please share your encouragement and support with her: Need to vent! I am so fed up with BMs who play mother of the year while doing almost nothing and still complain about anything they have to do! Parenting is not a part-time thing EVER and it is not just for show on Facebook or when your kid gets an award! I do 90% of the parenting 90% of the time and pay for 90% of SDs stuff and have BM calling ME to ask questions she should know as BM about her own kid but at same time BM HAS to make sure everyone know shes the BM and shes a good one, even though she stinks! She obviously wants my DH and I to fail with SD she is always looking for ways to hide things from us and make SD lie to us and try to get SD to say anything bad about us and is always surprised when SD wont go along with her game! She is hurting herself because DH and I work hard to have SD show respect to her BM and SD sees how we arent insecure or jealous enough to push an agenda on our KID! We are happy and healthy and have a great life together and I think it drives BM nuts that SD wants to be a part of something stable! I work so hard as a SM to make sure BM and SD have a good relationship and my DH and I work hard to make sure BM has every advantage to parent as she wants to, except for giving up custody because she would not take care of SD the way we do and SD says she hates being with BM and would be miserable if she wasnt with us most of the time (SD wants to call me mom) and BM just makes me question why we do what we do, even if it is the right thing. BM complains about everything. Pays almost nothing in CS, only has SD a couple nights a month, and will throw a fit every time she has to buy something for SD at her house that SD needs. She lies about SD and blames things on the poor kid! Im so frustrated. I have kids of my own and I cant imagine asking my SDs SM to take care of things that are private or special to my own kid or using them to get out of trouble because easy to say kids are the problem! SD sees her BM go and buy all the things she wants, a luxury car, fancy vacations without SD, new house, new clothes, always getting herself pampered (hair nails, the works) and then tells SD when SD asks for little practical things she NEEDS for her house and throws a fit if SD grows and needs new stuff! Has even stolen from SD at Christmas takes her money and spends it on herself! Ug! Its so frustrating. I dont know what to tell SD who comes home frustrated and upset with the way shes treated and the way BM makes her feel because I dont want to hurt SD and BMs relationship any more than it is, but SD is RIGHT to feel the way she does and it hurts my daughter in every way but biologically gets dismissed so easily, but i still dont think its right for her to look to me to take BMs place especially because BM would flip out and start being even worse than she is now for both SD and me. I wish some BMs would just step up and DO their job and be a parent! Just because you dont have your kid all the time doesnt mean you stop being a parent...or that you can do less or complain when your kid has a need!
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 19:00:20 +0000
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