I try thats all I can do I try to understand everything But - TopicsExpress

I try thats all I can do I try to understand everything But theres to much to bring in I try to be the best mother an make decisions that will help benefit notelynn (I think im doing good) I try to get to make it to the top of my dream but it seems like somehow my dreams are gone Everytime we think we are getting somwhere It seems like they add more to us Everytime I try it seems like I continue to fall But Im not gonna stop because my daughter is my #1 thing so when God sees Im ready I will make it to the top of my dream hopefully by july I will get to go to Nashville But wte God has planned will be what happens I get so aggravated cause none of my friends knows what its like to have a preemie I feel as if outta all my friends I stand out I guess thats not bad because I like to stand out lol But I have not one friend to talk to that can help I mean I have friends that will talk an try to help but not ones that has went thru what I have not ones that will completely Understand I would never wish on Noone to go thru what I have an what notelynn has because its hard an sad I have been thru alot since I found out I was pregnant an when you get pregnant you dont expect your baby will be born early or even sick But God has plans even tho this is very hard I will not ever give up on her because she is my world my life an my pride an joy she has taught me alot She has shown me miracles are real an she has prove to me she is a fighter Sometimes I dont wanna another kid because im afraid she or he will be worse or even the same aint no parent should have to see their baby like that But preemies an sick babies are the strongest kids ever an the smartest Even tho notelynn is behide for a 1 yr old she still is a really smart baby she has learned stuff that I dont even know how she learned dont compare my kid to yours because you dont know why shes behide an you dont understand what she has been thru she is a miracle an I will not give up on her an I pray an hope she doesnt give up her fight either I thank God each an every night an day for this beautiful girl she has completely changed my life I mean completely if you know me you will clearly understand how much she changed my life thank you so much God :)

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